Got 'em
By Anonymous - 20/01/2010 06:50 - United States
By Anonymous - 20/01/2010 06:50 - United States
By colorblind - 05/07/2009 21:49 - United States
By DazedAndConfused - 14/11/2021 11:00
By will3000 - 12/01/2011 13:28
By PiMan - 19/01/2010 19:20 - United States
By Crissylove10 - 18/01/2010 20:12 - United States
By Anonymous - 20/11/2021 19:02 - United States - Chicago
By Anonymous - 09/01/2011 18:25 - United States
By Damnsoup - 03/07/2009 00:12 - United Kingdom
By ThatCery - 16/01/2010 16:29 - United Kingdom
By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00
By Anonymous - 03/10/2012 04:39 - United States - Portland
By Anonymous - 09/12/2021 20:01 - United States - Trenton
By corgi problems - 15/09/2020 20:05
By Anonymous - 22/12/2014 07:53 - United States - Mooresville
By Mario - 28/02/2023 14:00
By Python22 - 05/09/2013 00:52 - United States - Midlothian
By BabyG2222 - 29/09/2012 09:14 - United States - Sturgeon Bay
OP here, Okay just want to clarify some stuff first. The term "spank the ferret" is a "nice" way of putting he was jerking off. I originally wrote "jerked off" but I guess fmylife didn't like that wording and changed it to a friendly term. So, no there wasn't an actually ferret (no animal was hurt in the making of fmylife). Okay with that done now for the background story. My boyfriend at the time loved sex (like every normal guy) and liked to do the "traditional **** ending, where the guy cums on the girls face" He liked to call it Spiderman. (I'm aware doing the Spiderman is not done that way however he didn't want to splat in his hand and throw it at me, it was a modified Spiderman). Anyways, he got this "bright" idea to wake me up this way (thinking I was find it funny and sexy at the same time, which I didn't.) And for all of you who said I should have helped him out, I was sleeping, he woke me up just before and when I turned around SPLAT he shot me in the face while singing the theme song. We broke up a month later because of an unrelated issue but needless to say I was pretty mad at him but forgave him like after a day.
By Anonymous - 03/12/2021 17:01
By Recovering Alcoholic - 17/12/2014 22:41 - United Kingdom - Kettering
By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 20:27 - United States - Fort Lauderdale
By Anonymous - 01/10/2020 05:01
By lopsided - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Gainesville
By aisbash - 01/09/2013 19:35 - United States - Los Angeles
By Jograd - 25/09/2012 17:13 - Australia - Sydney
By f03_f0r_l1f3 - 26/06/2009 05:31 - United States
By every time seriously - 03/01/2022 08:01
By never again - 29/07/2024 14:00 - United States
By glam300 - 30/12/2010 18:21 - United Kingdom
By CatDad - 18/12/2021 19:01 - United Kingdom
Keywords
OP here, for update 1 of a few. Basically, like #52 said, I believe that is the case. It's not so bad I can't go out in public (and for fat people they aren't big at all), but if they were on a average chicks body, they would be massive. As for my trunk, yeah.... I'm 5'-10, so it evens out.