Miscellaneous: Today, I jokingly told my friend that when a tree seems to sway...

By what have i done with my life - 21/07/2013 17:46 - United States - Akron

Today, I jokingly told my friend that when a tree seems to sway in the wind, it's really just having an orgasm. Not only did she believe me, she's been smugly informing everyone we know. She's 26. I seem to be friends with an absolute idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 620

You deserved it 6 012

Miscellaneous

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Same thing different taste

By AnonymousAmber - 31/10/2014 23:10 - United States - Yadkinville

Today, my best friend told me that she was a virgin again because she hadn't had sex in 6 months. She's 19 and actually believes it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 155

You deserved it 2 866

Taking it too far

By wolf boy - 10/07/2011 00:13 - United States

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 488

You deserved it 6 151

By CA19oo - 27/05/2012 13:13 - United States - Grovetown

Today, I got yelled at and called a pedo by a mother after I sat down in a swing next to her daughter. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I'm a 20 year old who really does enjoy swinging in my spare time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 857

You deserved it 4 875

It's all downhill from here…

By Tree Hugger - 22/12/2022 17:00 - United States

Today, I went skiing with a friend of mine. He went first. I heard a loud *THUD* and went to investigate. When I went past him, he yelled, "I ran into a tree. I don't feel so good!" He said it in such a defeated and humorous way, that I crashed into a tree myself because I couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 830

By Dimples - 03/01/2013 11:35 - United States - Sanford

Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 480

You deserved it 3 436

By Anonymous - 13/09/2016 16:33 - United States - Orlando

Today, I eavesdropped as my friend tried hinting to my crush that I like him. He replied, "Haha, eww. She looks like a fuckin' garden gnome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 533

You deserved it 1 739

By Anonymous - 21/08/2019 02:00 - Brazil

Today, I was riding my bike down a hill and noticed a pretty girl sitting at the bus stop. I guess I was staring pretty hard, because the next thing I knew, I was swerving off the road and smashing into a tree. She laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 670

You deserved it 2 131

By Eponine13 - 05/06/2019 22:00

Today, I thought it would be fun to climb a tree. My older sister also thought it would be fun to set the tree on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 940

You deserved it 177

Unbeliever

By Anonymous - 23/09/2009 02:31 - United States

Today, I was in a college band rehearsal when I got a call, saying, "Your car was just hit by a tree!" I said, "Yeah, right!" and hung up on her. Minutes later, the band manager walked in and told me that my car was totaled. I then went and stood in the rain to watch a tree get cut off my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 567

You deserved it 6 689

By xxxdwangelaxxx - 18/04/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, I went swinging with my friend at the park. Seeing a few cute guys playing basketball, I tried to act cute, laughing loudly and letting my hair fly all over the place. Just as they look over the swing broke. I fell on my face, my jeans sliding down, mooning them. They laughed hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 121

You deserved it 34 626

redbluegreen 40

Monday 22 July 2013 2:13

Well, it is a natural reaction when you're getting blown.

beclaurela 17

Monday 22 July 2013 2:17

The wind just penetrates the branches relentlessly. What else would happen?

Comments

redbluegreen 40

Monday 22 July 2013 2:13

Well, it is a natural reaction when you're getting blown.

roro_superloser 13

Monday 22 July 2013 2:26

& when there's a especially powerful wind when the trees are next to one another. That's what they call a orgy.

RoboCunnilingus 23

Monday 22 July 2013 2:51

Hell, don't we all sway a little to the left when we ******?

Wizardo 33

Monday 22 July 2013 2:53

Don't we all groan and creek a little too? I mean some even bend all the way back...

Lennes 12

Monday 22 July 2013 7:20

Can you imagine what tornados do to them? Lucky bastards.

Nicostream 16

Monday 22 July 2013 10:15

#1 I hereby announce that I've found an actually good pun on fml. I may die in peace now.

beclaurela 17

Monday 22 July 2013 2:17

The wind just penetrates the branches relentlessly. What else would happen?

s13495 19

Monday 22 July 2013 2:53

There's a tiny bit of logic behind it... When the wind blows the trees seeds may be knocked down. I think sycamore trees do this, the little spinning helicopter type seed (maybe have the wrong name)

zach205 24

Sunday 7 February 2016 21:26

24, that's nothing compared to cottonwood trees. They are the ones that release the seads that look surrounded in cotton, they in such abundance that it makes huge piles in corners.