Today, my roommate, who has bipolar disorder and refuses to take his meds, tried to stab me with a kitchen knife because I threw out his moldy cheese. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, after I cleaned out the fridge of things that expired months ago, my roommate got angry and insisted upon pulling all the moldy dairy products out of the garbage and putting them back because "they weren't mine and I shouldn't throw out other people's food." FML
Go vegan
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan and threw all of MY meats, cheeses, chocolates and even beans for some reason in the trash, because he "doesn't need that kind of toxic waste" in his life. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Pyrotechnics
Today, after I told my roommate last week she needed to find a new place to live because I thought she was psychotic, she set my house on fire. FML
Today, my roommate yelled at me yet again for using the dishwasher because it's "unsanitary." This is all while a mountain of her dishes were going mouldy in the sink. FML
Confused
Today, my roommate came home from work and yelled at me for my dinner being too spicy. The same dinner he denied stealing. FML
Today, my hippy nutjob of a roommate threw a bitch fit at me, all because he saw me chopping down a tree in Minecraft. FML
Today, my roommate broke into my spice cabinet so he could get high off of my nutmeg. FML
Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML
The runs
Today, I found out that my psycho roommate replaced my milk with milk of magnesia. How? By taking a huge gulp. Tonight is going to be fun. FML
Top comments
kjack49044 18
Maybe an intervention or change in roommate is in order...
tranced_ 45
cheesus !
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Comments (110)
telli164 30
Sounds more like schizophrenia
ebonyirony 29
That sounds nothing like schizophrenia.
ksks1234 33
31 and 40-- I don't think this fml has enough information for either of you to make a diagnosis.
blackonblight 33
Call the cops, 72 hour psych holds exist for a reason.
reymon8823 24
Seems reasonable bleu cheese is the best
azyjazy713 11
Hit up the RA and get the hell out of there. Nothing wrong with temporary housing or a room switch.
Zebediabolical 45
You're assuming that OP's in a college dorm. What if they live off campus. Or aren't in school at all? There's no RA for that.
therealjc_fml 14
wtf are you still doing there?
Sketch98 3
Run, as far away as you can.
rockhead1270 5
So who cut the cheese?
jh921971 10
Call the police
siggy_mcsigx 22
Regardless of physical violence, sharing constant living space with a depressed/bipolar person will ultimately have an effect on YOU...your mood, your stress level, your mental health, your comfort, your ability to express yourself. It's a bad environment to be living/studying in, so use this as evidence to report and switch out!!
bieebslover11 12
Why arnt you packing your bags ?