Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
Add a comment - Reply to : #
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account
Sign in
Top comments
By
kapippenger
| 0
Ahw, poor girl.
By
charlybarly
| 0
hey, at least your getting your ins
COMMENTS
By
charlybarly
| 0
hey, at least your getting your ins
Reply
bennetts211
| 2
How creative! Hahaha
Reply
JinDoritos
| 3
well, that is awkward. but hey, at least you get some. ?
Reply
zozohearts
| 0
There's a thing called turn off the lights.. There's even a song about it :D
Reply
yummcookie
| 0
my ex would only do it in the dark, but I eat my carrots ;)
Reply
fymother
| 13
if she can't love herself, there's no way she knows how to love someone else! sorry bud
Reply
whyXD
| 12
sooo, how did it go?
Reply
garrettsgirl
| 0
umm at least she is willing to do something just not in the way you thought she would.
Reply
SeasonedLemur
| 5
47# are you speaking of the legendary song by steel panther???!
Reply
Jammy01jams
| 2
She may have some sort of deformity on her stomach. (Know a girl with). So deal with it if you are grossed out by it, or reassure her that you don't mind.Not really an FML.
Reply
Rawr100
| 0
only in texas
Reply
NuTrees
| 9
I pictured a purple bathing suit lol
Reply
Sexy_Lettie
| 2
I pictured a green one lol
Reply
badmamajama123
| 0
i picture black, with red curvy streaks going through it
Reply
hydef14
| 2
I think that some people have fetishes for things like that.
Reply
godmax1
| 3
I pictured a matching swimming cap even tho it wasn't mentioned
Reply
kingtz
| 6
One hole in the crotch....does that mean anal is out of the question?
Reply
Iamaninchworm
| 0
I pictured a pink one.
Reply
BrokenDreamer24
| 14
47- That's not true. I hate my body and how I look, yet I love my boyfriend more than anything in this world. I'm very self-conscious about how I look, but I would never go as so far to do what OP's girlfriend did.
Reply
dolphincheddar
| 10
I pictured a black leather one covered in spikes with a skull symbol. but Thats cuz I watch too much porn
Reply
adam797
| 0
i pictured purple one too with white poka dots
Reply
htb2050
| 11
blue!
Reply
twinmum_fml
| 6
#153 I pictured a purple one too. lmao
Reply
FMMFL1992
| 3
I'd be distracted thinking about what's under the swimsuit and why she's so self conscious about it. She probably got a really hair back or something
Reply
Lexiloulynn
| 2
I pictured the swimsuit the ugly daughter from grown-ups wore:/
Reply
me too!
Reply
sydney_herbach
| 3
wow I have extreme insecurities but I think wearing a bathing suit would only make that more obvious. otherwise your bf prob doesn't notice, unless u have a deformity you're prob ok
Reply
ceepevoy
| 0
I wonder if this girl is severely overweight or if it's a mental thing, either way I think it sucks that she felt that bad about her body that she went to that extreme.
Reply
angiedancesalott
| 8
219 - you made my life.
Reply
Iamnotmyself
| 17
373 please show me where the evidence is for that, or are you going off assumptions?
Reply
Lemycakes
| 4
me too!!
Reply
phoenix89
| 2
me to haha
Reply
wtvr
| 2
i just hope op didnt laugh as hard as i did just now
Reply
BelleCharmante
| 7
My mental image was a nice, deep burgundy.
Reply
Saburai
| 0
lol yeah!
Reply
Bigorangebastard
| 3
agreed!
Reply
bambilmf
| 0
*all of the lights
Reply
kosmickart
| 0
ME TO!!!!
Reply
hhhiii
| 0
lmao nice
Reply
yoyoforpeace
| 14
I pictured a black bathing suit and a bush surrounding the hole.. :(
Reply
MissDanish17
| 5
Still counts! I JUST HAD SEX!!!!
Reply
sleepyglowstar
| 32
That is an ace song too!
Reply
driinkbleach
| 18
#54 is the cutest comment ever
Reply
Balthizaar
| 15
maybe it's a really large hole?
By
kapippenger
| 0
Ahw, poor girl.
Reply
CatEyes66
| 0
I wonder what she has experienced in her life to make her so self conscious about her body. Cutting a hole in a one piece bathing suit to have sex is pretty serious.
Reply
peachesbeach
| 0
she was trying her best :( it's quite a clever idea tbh
Reply
sansan2
| 0
nice pic #2
Reply
chongers18
| 0
When you saw her walk out you should've started humming the Jaws theme song and sexually attacked her, while pretending you were a shark and she was a helpless swimmer. :)
Reply
Opium_Production
| 5
^I bet she's a phreak
Reply
chongers18
| 0
^^ who doesn't want one of me in the bedroom?
Reply
wtf20007
| 10
now, that sounds like fun
Reply
denktron420_fml
| 0
kapippenger, I LOVE your picture. Fallout ftw! OP, I'm sorry. that sucks.
Reply
kapippenger
| 0
Thanks, BA game. Oh and nice Jaws idea whoever said that. Lmao
Reply
crissyspic
| 0
I wonder why she's so insecure. you didn't even mention if you thought she was hot or not.
By
justalilrandom2
| 4
Oh my, you lucked out there son, we all want a girlfriend who wears a crotchless one piece to do it...
Reply
Mach10
| 0
Actually... I'd never considered it until now, but frankly, I'm a little aroused
Reply
humzizzl3
| 0
lol you chubby chasers
Reply
CryMoreFMLs
| 14
Large people need love too! It's not fair that skinny people get it all...
I'm a large man and I am proud.
I'm a large man and I am proud.
Reply
peterubino
| 2
hahaha
Reply
justalilrandom2
| 4
Chubby girls give more options for sex than normal, you've got extra folds you can use.... Yum.
Reply
darkangel4700
| 0
yum "hey hun I found some cheese" wtf! lol I'm a tubby girl so I can talk
Reply
applznoatz
| 1
I like guys with some meat on their bones! Guys just look like wormy meth heads when they're too skinny. I'm not talking naturally slim, or athletic slim types. I mean wormy little skeezy types. Ew.
Reply
decidedlyvague
| 11
you're tubby so you can't talk. BAHAHAHAHA
Reply
lulu84_fml
| 5
yes!
Reply
karpoi
| 11
The fuck? That's disturbing...... but each to their own I guess.....
By
xCocobirdx
| 0
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
Show the comment
Reply
chomoma
| 0
LOL
Reply
jayfish7
| 0
STFU
Reply
SugarCrazy
| 14
Damn, people these days are just getting more and more creative with the comments...
Reply
NikkiFlysKites
| 8
329, such a clever comment. Only a thousand people have bitched about the same thing. Bravo for being so creative.
Reply
SugarCrazy
| 14
356,
Who pooped in your cornflakes?
Who pooped in your cornflakes?
Reply
Imgonnahaveabf
| 9
Uh ohh, bitch fit!¡!¡
By
xjessxjessx
| 0
yea at least your still getting to have sex :)
Reply
iSurf_fml
| 8
Yeah but too bad it won't get him brownie points, cause' technically, it doesn't count.
Reply
hatesfate
| 6
it doesn't count? how many times have you hit your head surfing to think that?
Reply
rawrriri
| 8
.-. at least you still get to have sex even though she's extremely insecure about her body. As long as your needs were pleased.
Reply
tsume24
| 3
you hate stupid people yet you think sex doesn't count if both people aren't naked, and you "refuse to believe that 'alot' is 'a lot?'" not to mention you even look like an all-around derp and a half. can you go back to middle school so you don't make yourself look so dumb next time? thanks.
Reply
goshpeople
| 4
Leaving aside the idea that somehow non-naked sex "doesn't count", how in the world does having sex give you brownie points?
Reply
nissanman_fml
| 16
I think iSurf's mother dropped her on her head too many times when she was a baby. She claims to love proper grammar, yet fails to use it. She says she hates the stupid, but her highly unintelligent comments describe her as just that: stupid. Just reading the about section on her profile caused strain on my eyes. Please remain in America, iSurf, so that your stupidity may remain contained within the US of A.
Reply
dancebgdance
| 0
lmao XD I love people in general
Reply
ChuckNorrisBeard
| 0
owned XD
Reply
vistamar
| 3
Lol iSurf got freaking told...
Reply
pinkspaceboundro
| 0
brownie points? he is getting a homerun
Reply
tsume24
| 3
165, as much as I hate being American myself, I think we should give her to the toaster waffle girl's mom. keep the stupidity contained and such.
Reply
Fruitmonster2
| 15
What if America doesn't want her? Wait... I thought there weren't any women on the internet. Or so I've been told.
Reply
tsume24
| 3
271: yeah, I'm just an illusion.
Reply
maddehsaurr
| 0
35 any penetration counts.
Reply
maddehsaurr
| 0
35 any penetration counts.
Reply
iSurf_fml
| 8
48- Like 87 times, but who's counting?
Reply
iSurf_fml
| 8
Wow you guys are assholes, I didn't think before posted. Sorry for giving you headaches.
Reply
swift1fan4ever
| 0
not all Americans are idiots, idiot.
Reply
kapippenger
| 0
Every country has people they are ashamed of. It's a shame we have to have those shameful people. Shame on them!!
Reply
tsume24
| 3
you didn't give us headaches, dear. many people can recognize sheer stupidity with about as much effort as it took for you to produce said stupidity. am I going too fast for you?
Reply
emilieee_fml
| 0
tee hee hee derp in a half:) made my morning!!:)
Reply
iSurf_fml
| 8
363-Jesus Christ, it's funny how much you can judge me from a few comments, "dear". You must really take your shit seriously, as it seems you're a die-hard expert commenter. Yeah, I'll admit it, I'm half stupid. I'm a hypocrite, we all are. Sorry for your time.
Reply
iSurf_fml
| 8
Sirin, please delete this. I'm ashamed of myself for trolling.
By
mimititi_fml
| 3
Best FML EVER!!!
Reply
chocomilk82
| 0
nahhhh i've seen better
Reply
abcd4242
| 0
Haha the vibrator was the best!!!
Reply
twizzlers1718
| 0
IMO, the one where the girl tries to bite her boyfriends neck and actually pops a pimple in her mouth is the best FML.
Reply
darkangel4700
| 0
no no no the one wer the guy watches his boss try to put a magnet to card board for like an hour is the best
Reply
Sessyann
| 1
No the best was when a girls bf jabbed her in the face with his "shark" and started humming the theme song to jaws
Reply
Miss_Whipped
| 43
Definitely the one where the girl caught her boyfriend and his best friend playing "Dick Wars" with glow-in-the-dark condoms.
By
kings1fan
| 6
This is pretty funny! Look on the bright side at least you still get to have sex!
By
Mirorbo
| 26
Poor darling... can you really blame her? Society has turned very shallow these days. If one has just a tiny bit of tummy fat, they're ridiculed for it and called obese. It's sad...
Reply
fuff_fml
| 4
so true...
Reply
DjeePee
| 24
But why do you think she's a little bit fat? I was also very self conscious about my body when I was a teenager (and sometimes I still am, but never like this), and I was the thinniest (right spelled?) girl of my class.
You're right about society, though, but even the (extra) small and medium sized people have often issues.
You're right about society, though, but even the (extra) small and medium sized people have often issues.
Reply
lidemocr
| 0
I think she was just sighting an example and you're kind of braggy "Ms Thinnest" lol sorry couldn't resist
Reply
bryyxoo
| 0
Even an FML comment seems to make people insecure these days. Sorry, couldn't resist.
Reply
SeedlessMe
| 13
Um, 65-she wasn't being 'braggy' in the slightest! She was stating that she was skinny, but still self conscious about her body. I was so skinny in highschool, I had no boobs! Not always a good thing.. I get it, chica :)
Reply
MisterMichael
| 9
yeah yeah blame it on society
Reply
darkangel4700
| 0
like me -.-
Reply
Nyankat5
| 0
very true and like me too
Reply
keyofdestiny13
| 24
No where in the FML did it say OP's girlfriend thought she was fat. It said "self conscious." You can be self conscious about other things on your body aside from fat or lack thereof.
By
barlessprison
| 16
Poor girl's going to be 10 times more self conscious now that you've announced this to a bunch of strangers over the Internet.
Reply
smurfsarwales
| 9
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
Show the comment
Reply
SirHobnobs
| 0
But that still doesn't justify him posting it here
Reply
my_fml_account
| 2
She wouldn't know it was her boyfriend? How many people do you think act this crazy? It's pretty much just OPs girlfriend.
Reply
bingababe
| 16
44 I'm guessing that if she is an FML user and did read this, she'd definitely know it was her boyfriend. I mean there can't be that many girls cutting holes out of bathing suits to facilitate sex......
By
DjeePee
| 24
I hope you refused it, OP. I don't think it's a very good idea to have sex with someone who is afraid of her own body. She absolutely needs to love and respect herself, otherwise you'll both will get frustrated (you because you'll never will see her naked, she because she thinks (you think) she's ugly). This is not a good start for a healthy (sex) life.
But boy, she has some serious issues.
But boy, she has some serious issues.
Reply
annababyyy
| 0
coming from a girl with a mask on?
Reply
DjeePee
| 24
Coming from a girl without a real picture?
Reply
smurfsarwales
| 9
43raped 22. and also 43 probably doesn't always where the mask, its not like she's to self conscious of her face to take it off?
Reply
awickedsomething
| 0
Well, that was off topic. -_-
Reply
SeedlessMe
| 13
You realize it's a profile picture, right? Doubtful she walks around with the mask on 24/7...
Reply
xXshadowrollerXx
| 6
11 - Usually, I like your posts, and I like this one as well, but I think it's best to admit defeat.
Reply
DjeePee
| 24
Defeat? Why? We're not in a war, aren't we?
The only thing I like to know is why I 'failed'. I honestly can't see it.
The only thing I like to know is why I 'failed'. I honestly can't see it.
Reply
tsume24
| 3
djeepee, you had really good points and I totally agree. OP should learn how to make his girlfriend feel like the sexiest girl in the world, especially if she's got self-image and confidence issues.
btw I like your picture so everyone else can stfu.
btw I like your picture so everyone else can stfu.
Reply
Alex94xela
| 0
I like the gas mask it looks cool. where'd u get it from?
Reply
cradle6
| 13
Damn, people are ignorant about this kinda thing. 11 is right, they are some serious issues with this girl. 99% of the girls I've dated or even just knew were insecure and self conscious but this FML is just a new level of insanity.
OP, I think maybe the best option is to back off from this girl. She needs space, and needs to learn to love herself. This is definitely a sign of something much deeper.
OP, I think maybe the best option is to back off from this girl. She needs space, and needs to learn to love herself. This is definitely a sign of something much deeper.
Reply
vistamar
| 3
haha im waiting for some girl to call 175 "cute." I swear every comment i see with him theres always that one girl that comments that hahaha. Its hilarious.
Reply
cradle6
| 13
199, haha I think you're confusing me with someone else. I don't seem to remember that happening at all on this site.
Reply
zinjiitsdanaa
| 3
175 you're cute.
Reply
Proudmary
| 2
Eh, she'll get over it in time. If this is one of them long-term relationships, obviously. It will take her a while and will involve lots of lovin with the lights off...but sure enough at one point she will get over it.
Reply
mima77
| 0
You better tell her!
Reply
8313girl
| 28
Being self conscious is one thing but this is taking it too far. Besides there are ways around an extra curvy body like corsets, thigh highs and garter belts. Make it sexy girls! Don't make it weird.