Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML
Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I love her for the first time. She said, "Thanks." FML
Today, I had to resort to telling my boyfriend that I have a praise kink, just so that he would actually compliment me. FML
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Top comments
sugarshane007 20
Wow!! Sleep on your back buddy!
Mordakai420 6
Run bro, run! The strap-ons! The horror!
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Comments (90)
hellonyancat 6
Oh no! A girl wants to try something new in the bedroom! You know you can always say no. Just suggest something else!
TurquoiseJesus 15
Seriously though, if you do give a shot, I would set up some mattresses against the walls, so when you come like a high pressure water hose (and you will), you'll be comfy during the time plastered against the wall.
CinnamonBunny 16
I've done it to my boyfriend. He was very, very dubious at first...but I can be very persuasive. ;) he ended up loving it. Don't be too quick to refuse to try new things.
DustyStorm 16
How do I convince mine? I wanna try...
taylorseeey 6
Let her it feels pretty good this is comin from a gay guy
journeytotheend 16
Put it in her ass instead
mellb_fml 3
The guys here saying time for a new girlfriend, bet they're the ones hounding their girlfriends for anal
vencku 13
YES! My boyfriend loves anal sex. It allows variety, which is "nice", according to him. (I'm not so fond of it.) But whenever I say that we could penetrate him to get some "variety", he refuses vocally and full-heartedly.
ParisMilton93 15
That's exactly what I tell my boyfriend...what's good for one is good for the other...he wants to do it to me, he can experience what it's like, then maybe he will realise why I am so opposed to it...it FREAKING HURTS!!
m3lyc 18
I'm totally hetero but I LOVE anal play. It's extremely pleasurable and causes INTENSE orgasms. You'll love it, trust me!
toastedjellybowl 7
It's not as bad as one may think once you get used to it. Let her try it once!
diva239 8
Try it, you'll love it!
SmokeyPlague 12
that's scary don't let her catch you with your back door open