Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML
Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I love her for the first time. She said, "Thanks." FML
Today, I had to resort to telling my boyfriend that I have a praise kink, just so that he would actually compliment me. FML
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Top comments
sugarshane007 20
Wow!! Sleep on your back buddy!
Mordakai420 6
Run bro, run! The strap-ons! The horror!
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Comments (90)
MooseKnuckle5150 13
Just let her know turnaround is fair play
AXZ_is_hawt 5
Sounds like something I would say to troll my boyfriend. Preferably in public so he couldn't freak out. :)
me1224 12
LOL
dwc2134 5
Hell, roll with it. You might enjoy it, doesn't make you homosexual or void your masculinity or any bullshit like that*. *I'm not saying gays can't be masculine or anything like that, I'm just trying to dispel the nonsense reservations a lot of straight guys have on ass-play.
shouldwork 3
I don't know, I'd find that kind of enticing
ForeverFemme 14
Did u ever think she could of just wanted to 'spank' u silly?? don't get me wrong, either or is more than a good time..
xtcolin 7
His reply to change the subject was to compliment her on having a cute Adam's apple.
HWpopster 7
That's when you run
wideload96 1
Would that be called breaking and entering?
meagann01 4
Such a romantic girlfriend you have there my friend.