Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
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Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Well, clearly he brought you there to show you the importance of personal hygiene.
kahaari 0
three words? clean. your. vag.
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Comments (309)
ohxberlin 0
#111 we're talking about fishyyy smells hereeeee! not jesus/sex=rape??(wtf)/babies
cinderelly 0
thank you 73. damn, at least you know what you're talking about. OP: that sucks. but like 108 said, it could have been the stereotypical idea and not you.
elemandem 0
haha, #96. But yeah, the ******, like the eye is self cleaning. So you should just use water to clean it in the shower... You can try to use a mild soap if you feel it is necessary... but not a soap with a strong smell... Since soap is basic and the ****** is very acidic, it can throw off the pH balance in the ******. The ****** may have a slight odor but if it's really "fishy" that can be a problem. It can be a sign of an infection, or a sign that the good bacteria in the ****** isn't doing it's job. So it'd be a good idea to see a doctor.
elemandem 0
& jandersoniii, my boyfriend and I have sex, yet I've never been raped in my life... Sex is a necessar part of life. We couldn't continue as a species if we didn't do it. We evolved to reproduce the way we do... survival of the fittest, and apparently the "fittest" was a species where the female got pregnate.
razzumfrazzum 0
Also I find it funny that janderson has "refined" her claim that all male-female sexual intercourse is rape. In a different FML she said that all penetration, instead of male-female intercourse, is rape and then it was pointed out that penetration has no gender, therefore women would also be rapist due to sex toys, fingers, tongues, etc. This was pointed out of course by me, a Undergraduate majoring in Applied Phys./ Aerospace Eng. So much for your Ph.D. in Queer studies. Get a REAL degree. A B.S. in Psychology holds more weight than your P.O.S. (Piece of Shit) degree. (No offense to Psych majors)
Tsukasa_fml 0
#23 is full of shit. 10 million per second? That would be every woman in the world every 5 minutes.
azure8787 0
@ 96 - clearly you're not considering that each woman is also raped multiple times per second... DUH! lol
jhkmyun 0
#23 LMAO 10 million females a second? The entire worlds female population would have to be raped in 5-6 minutes for that statistic to be true
some_random_dude 0
jandersoniii... shut the **** up and die in a burning hole. for your true equality then women should have penises surgically attached so the man doesn't need to ejaculate to fertilize the egg cell. Or we could just discover a way to make humans reproduce asexually. what now stupid bitch.
lisafannypack 0
#23 oh please are you kidding me? you obviously have no idea what you are talking about 10 million women are beaten, tortured, raped, or killed each second? that's not even possible a death in the U.S. occurs every 12 seconds i believe ONE DEATH every 12 seconds so obviously those numbers don't stack up