Love: Today, my boyfriend of 2 months got upset and frustrated with...

By Anonymous - 20/06/2013 02:23 - United States - Kansas City

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months got upset and frustrated with me because he had yet to meet my mom. I'd told him on our first date that she passed away 4 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 612

You deserved it 3 601

Love

Empathy lives

Cut her off

Nice guy

How Soon is Now?

By Anonymous - 14/05/2021 12:59 - Colombia - Bogot?

Today, I realized that my boyfriend‘s birthday was two weeks ago, so I immediately sent him a message as if it was today. He didn’t believe my excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169

You deserved it 1 699

By Brummsta - 27/01/2010 07:41 - Australia

Today, I woke up with a cordless drill on my bed. The one I lent my neighbour last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 898

You deserved it 2 590

By Scholar - 05/09/2012 16:13 - United States

Today, for the second day in a row, I got to hear both of my roommates having sex, through two closed doors and a hallway. This is as I hit my thirtieth month of involuntary celibacy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 369

You deserved it 3 896

By metalflower01 - 11/01/2012 16:31 - United States

Today, I had to cancel my wedding. On top of being upset about the break up, I was informed I owed a $900 cancellation fee for not using the venue. Single and broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 114

You deserved it 4 030

By worried - 16/08/2011 13:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 674

You deserved it 55 198

By tellingthetruth - 21/03/2012 16:25 - United Kingdom - Studley

Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 158

You deserved it 14 107

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 23:37 - Australia - Mona Vale

Today, I walked out of a job interview feeling confident because I'd really hit it off with the interviewer. He called me an hour later to tell me that I didn't get the job, since he was afraid we'd "get along too well and never get any work done." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 664

You deserved it 3 716

By Anonymous - 12/11/2011 09:27 - Australia

Today, at work, I got chilli powder in my eye. Now not only do I have a swollen, blistered eye, but I am covered in milk as my boss assured me that would help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 025

You deserved it 2 802

What about me?

By crushed - 23/05/2020 02:00

Today, my wife told me about an old boyfriend she had. She told me that they used to fool around, and that she’d give him blow jobs all the time. I never get any action like that from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 617

You deserved it 230

By Arrgh - 27/05/2009 07:11 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on webcam with someone and the conversation died so I said "brb". I sat there for five minutes not realising I had left my webcam on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 917

You deserved it 79 819

By NotSoClean - 21/07/2009 18:53 - United States

Today, I noticed that my very expensive facial cleanser was almost out. I had moved in with my boyfriend recently, and questioned him, telling him "You don't have to use so much to wash your face. That's a $70 bottle." To which he responded, "Oh, that nice-smelling stuff? Yeah, I use that on my junk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 527

You deserved it 8 610

By TheDumper - 21/06/2012 10:02 - United States - Chandler

Today, and for the last week, I've resorted to driving myself to the nearest corner store to take my daily dump. I'm doing this because I recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I'm afraid he'll be disgusted at how often I clog the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 183

You deserved it 29 994

By distracted - 16/09/2012 07:00 - Canada - Victoria

Today, I went out for lunch with a guy I hadn't seen in a couple of months. He seemed to be staring at my chest quite a bit, but I wasn't too bothered by it. Turns out there was still an XL sticker on my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 007

You deserved it 6 785

Kinda sus, dude

By Anonymous - 10/01/2015 20:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind, "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 072

You deserved it 5 151

By Kate - 07/03/2009 18:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 595

You deserved it 8 223

By Sally - 31/10/2018 22:00 - United States

Today, I went over to the house of a guy I have hooked up with a few times. After we got done, I asked him why we were not in the room across the hall. He said that was his twin brother's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 740

You deserved it 1 281

By Alex - 30/09/2009 06:46 - Belgium

Today, I was notified that I've been going to the wrong courses for 4 weeks. A friend of mine was the only person to tell me that the administration had taken the privilege to change my courses. I have now failed 5 courses due to absences and have been suspended from college for 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 580

You deserved it 5 364

By parasheeeet - 13/01/2016 17:05 - United States - Birmingham

Today, after months of trying to train my cockatiel to perch on my finger, he finally trusted me enough to fly from his cage and land on my hand. I panicked and accidentally backhanded him across the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 038

You deserved it 19 917

Timing is key

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 08:04

Today, we live in a society where an Uber Eats order arrives a lot faster than the authorities. To make things worse, the Uber Eats order arrives screwed up as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 101

Graded

By df22 - 03/07/2020 20:08

Today, I got my language final exam back. It was a 10-page essay front and back, and I saw that I received a D. The teacher told me the plot was too hard to follow and it jumped all over the place. It turns out he forgot to read the back of every page. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 860

You deserved it 133

By Jules - 15/09/2017 17:00

Today, the first day of school, I threw up on my teacher in the middle of class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 302

You deserved it 271

By somebody - 01/06/2015 03:37 - United States

Today, the babysitter not only clogged the toilet, they tried to unclog it with our vacuum cleaner hose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 126

You deserved it 2 237

By nana. - 15/02/2009 15:29 - Canada

Today, I was playing musical chairs at a family reunion. It's a well known fact that I'm competitive and tend to hip check people to get that last chair. It came down to me and The Nana. I won. The Nana has a broken hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 450

You deserved it 72 975

By insultedguy - 03/01/2011 17:28 - Netherlands

Today, I went to the store and ran into an old friend that I hadn't seen in years. We chatted a little, and just as I was leaving he grabbed his mobile phone. Later, I added him on Facebook. Turns out the last thing he posted was a picture of my back saying: "Look who got even fatter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 216

You deserved it 4 407

By Cheating - 27/01/2012 23:52 - United States

Today, I was looking through my boyfriend's Facebook photos, when I saw a recent comment by one of his friends asking how his night out with "Danielle" went. He replied: "Dude, keep that shit on the down-low." We've been dating for over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 780

You deserved it 3 162

By M. Moore - 10/06/2019 18:00

Today, my 12-year-old son came home after a week with his father. He was still wearing the same socks and underwear I sent him out with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 057

You deserved it 210

By s0728 - 01/09/2014 21:37 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 502

You deserved it 3 291

By blahbags - 06/04/2009 13:39 - United Kingdom

Today, I was going on holiday. As I was checking in my bags, I said to the really cute steward, "I think I'm overweight." He told me about discounts for customers of 'larger proportions.' I was talking about my suitcase being overweight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 727

You deserved it 17 741

By Anonymous - 03/11/2011 03:58 - United States

Today, I went to the bank to make a deposit. While I was waiting on my transaction, the bank tellers were making fun of me. I could tell cause I heard them through the speaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 074

You deserved it 2 620

By thatsucks - 28/02/2016 20:49 - United States - Seattle

Today, I learned that my housemate used a dry vacuum to unclog the toilet before moving out and then didn't change the vacuum bag. He left several weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 820

You deserved it 1 553

By mother of piggies - 04/04/2018 15:00

Today, I learnt that my guinea pig can shoot poop across the room like a tiny brown torpedo. How did I find this out? It landed in my coffee. It wasn't until after I'd finished my coffee that I noticed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 025

You deserved it 396

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 21:15 - United States

Today, I was released from jail. I had helped a three year old girl get up after falling on a wet floor at the mall last night when the security guards tasered me. Only this morning did they tell me they had mistaken me for a child molester that looks a little bit like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 947

You deserved it 3 532

By Anonymous - 03/11/2010 17:14 - United States

Today, after 30 minutes of pre-heating the oven to make a special meatloaf for my husband's birthday, I remembered that I had hidden the cake in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 620

You deserved it 31 984

By Grossed Out - 13/03/2010 10:35 - Australia

Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 743

You deserved it 2 780

Weird-ass kids

By fml9124 - 05/12/2020 02:02

Today, my Asian girlfriend broke up with me because I'm not Asian, I'm Irish-American, 100%. She doesn't have a problem with me, though. It's her kids. Her grown children want her dating Asian men. She's 62, I'm 63. Is that like reverse racism when the kids are more racist than the parents? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 87

By toosmall - 23/10/2016 21:27

Today I got a $60 parking ticket for not paying the $2.50 pay-to-park fee. I checked my bank records, which proved that I'd paid the fee, for the correct space too. The problem is the ticket is too small to contest in traffic court. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 672

You deserved it 890

By Spatch - 24/09/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, my navy boyfriend, who's stationed in Italy, calls me to say he is in San Francisco and is coming to see me. After scrambling to get ready, he calls me back to say he doesn't recognize the train station. After searching on Google Maps, it becomes clear he's drunk at Oktoberfest. In Germany. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 149

You deserved it 3 251

By Anonymous - 30/07/2019 04:01

Today, I finished my first shift at my new summer job. I've only been working there for 6 hours and they already call me, "The blonde one". I made straight A's in my last semester of college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 449

You deserved it 315

By buttpain - 01/12/2016 18:29

Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 549

You deserved it 823

By Infadel - 22/07/2014 21:55 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I was prepping for an interview after several months of unemployment. I had just finished brushing my teeth when I reached back and grabbed a towel behind me to wipe my face. Turns out it wasn't a towel, it was my newly dry-cleaned suit jacket that my wife had put there for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 771

You deserved it 10 485

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Top comments

Nolimit2217 32

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:44

He sounds like he is very attentive!

RodzillaX 30

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:44

Hopefully he manages to get that detail to stick soon. -_-

Nolimit2217 32

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:44

He sounds like he is very attentive!

NeatNit 32

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:51

hey come on, it's hard to memorize so much information when meeting someone new. doesn't mean he wasn't listening...

SuperSofie 23

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Thursday 20 June 2013 12:02

Yeah sure #12, but I'd think "my mum's dead" isn't one of those trivial things you'd forget (when paying attention)...

feelingold 18

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Thursday 20 June 2013 15:11

He was probably too busy looking at your tits on the first date. don't take it personally. Look on the bright side, at least he's probably paying attention to other things now.

Nolimit2217 32

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Thursday 20 June 2013 17:23

He doesn't sound like he should be in a relationship.. That's one of those things you cannot justify forgetting.

acerredrum 23

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Thursday 20 June 2013 21:00

I have sever short term memory loss to the point where I forget fairly important things. I keep notes of things I need to do and remember around the house for when I forget not if. While I really don't think I would forget something that big perhaps this is what is wrong with the boyfriend instead of inattentiveness? I would think he would of warned her though.

jramirez16 9

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Friday 21 June 2013 8:55

You forgot the "e" on severe lol. Sorry it just went with the comment :)

acerredrum 23

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Friday 21 June 2013 19:40

So I did, thank you.

RodzillaX 30

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:44

Hopefully he manages to get that detail to stick soon. -_-

Talientary 8

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:45

It's okay, try to remind him and see how that goes.

Norja 33

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:45

You're dating a moron.

lifesucks1217 6

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Thursday 20 June 2013 15:47

forgetting something does not make a person a moron.....

Alicestraza 33

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Thursday 20 June 2013 15:51

Forgetting that your girlfriend's mum died does.

jonha21 11

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Friday 21 June 2013 1:57

#41 still doesnt seems to get the Picture

applebramble 22

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:45

He clearly didn't listen to you when you first told him because that's not something you easily forget :/ I'm sorry for your loss OP . And I think I can speak for her right now that she wouldn't approve him for forgetting such a thing...

acerredrum 23

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Thursday 20 June 2013 20:57

You have never met her and you cannot speak for her. Frankly it is very rude of you to even try. For all we know OP's mom would say, "He is very sweet, he just forgot this one thing." or "Give him one more chance, if he screws up leave him." or hell, "Chicken livers." We don't know and shouldn't assume.

Carmstro 13

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Friday 21 June 2013 23:10

58, just wondering, was chicken livers the first thing that came to your mind or did you put some thought into it?

FMLsOhilarious 6

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:46

You would think he'd remember something like that! I'm sorry OP. Maybe you should ask him to dig deep into his memory and maybe he'll recall what you told him 14 days ago.

EvilUndead 9

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:51

60 days ago, not 14.

rivaraven 35

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:47

Try reminding him and see what he does, when his little brain gets the piece of information.

flashback.miss 28

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:51

If he can't be bothered to remember something as life changing and heartbreaking as your mother's death, then you need to reconsider your relationship. RIP, OP's mom.

imtooshy 18

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Thursday 20 June 2013 11:51

Not the sharpest tool in the shed you're dating. Perhaps you should bring him to her grave for his formal meeting. Smfh. He clearly doesn't listen to you.

Orchard 33

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Friday 21 June 2013 5:31

@10, this is my favorite comment on here; great idea since he wants to "meet" her mom, she should definitely take him graveside to get it through to him. Assuming OP is okay with that, which if it were me, I would be, because sometimes just knowing your loved one's parent has passed on isn't enough, but sharing the experience of memorializing them by visiting the grave can be a emotionally and spiritually connecting event.