Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML

Today, I had a boyfriend who wanted to wait until marriage before having sex. When I came home, I realised he must have married my roommate. FML

Today, in the small hours of the morning, my roommate's boyfriend kicked his foot through the thin wall separating our bedrooms during sex. They didn't even stop. FML

Threesome weirdness

Today, my roommate informed me that I need to move out, due to me having sex with his boyfriend. Even though he gave us permission, and told us to use protection. FML

Today, I found out my boyfriend has to picture someone else when we have sex. The most recent: my roommate. FML

Cougartown

Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML

Twisted

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

It's not the size that counts

Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML

Served and deserved

Today, my roommate's girlfriend came to visit for a couple of days, and we fucked behind his back. My roommate told me he just tested positive for syphilis. FML