By Getmeout - 31/05/2012 06:50 - United States - Hartfield

Today, while sitting in my Forensic Psychology class, my professor listed all of the main traits that indicate someone may very well be a sociopath. Every single trait described my fiancé perfectly. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 720
You deserved it 5 734

Same thing different taste

Top comments

OhDearBetrayal 25

Sociopaths are very nice people. Don't believe all of the stereotypes. I mean they don't all murder and get caught.

Are you the guy who went to break up with his abusive, controlling girlfriend and got engaged instead?


OhDearBetrayal 25

Sociopaths are very nice people. Don't believe all of the stereotypes. I mean they don't all murder and get caught.

They may not all murder and "get caught", but there's a reason why there is diagnostic criteria for so-called "sociopaths", formerly known as "psychopaths"...

KM96 24

So what you are saying is that not Sociopaths ALL murder and get caught... But does that mean there is the possibility her fiancé might ... And NOT get caught ? Im confused

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

You guys don't catch on to sarcastic humour very well, do you?

abceasyas123abc 12

But in all honesty, not all sociopaths murder. Some turn out to be very clever and manipulative and make great white collar criminals. Or successful heads of multinational corporations. I'd recommend reading 'The Psychopath Test', OP. Very interesting book.

Regardless of how some aren't murderers, it's still not the situation that OP wants to be in.

twisted_cherub 14

Psychopaths and sociopaths are not the same thing. Serial killers and the like are psychopaths. They are born with the inability to feel remorse and a strong urge to seek out the emotional responses they lack through risk taking and impulsive behavior. Sociopaths are simply socially awkward. They may be somewhat self-centered, manipulative, and seem fake. They consider what they get out of any situation and only show emotion when it serves their purpose. They will, on the other hand, go to great lengths to fit in with what society considers normal. Unfortunately, OP, your relationship probably won't work out because your boyfriend will never feel deeply for you; if he truly is a sociopath, that is.

OP should take a self esteem test. Common traits of sociopaths are along the lines of petty, remorseless, manipulative criminals. Dude sounds like a winner.

I don't think sociopaths are all criminals. If they are manipulative, then they can just as easily rise to a high spot in the business world. Or politics. Also, wouldn't it be possible that some people have different levels of sociopathy? I feel like I have many sociopathic tendencies.

so basically that's the average high school student?

They aren't all murderers but none of them feel compassion or care about anybody else. Clearly the one you met was only pretending to give a rats ass about you. Every single sociopath is dangerous and can kill and harm with no trouble at all. Always be on alert when near one.

Not all sociopaths are criminals. A lot of them can also be diagnosed as a narcissistic too.

I'm gonna get controversial here and point out that "sociopath" and "psychopath" are just socially constructed categories for specific patterns of human behavior. Fun fact: psychology, while sometimes handy, is about 70% bullshit intended to arbitrarily categorize and deviantize people. Read up on "critical psychology" to find out more.

Actually, sociopaths are the same as psychopaths. The only difference is that in modern society it is a specific kind of "psycopathism". Sociopaths feel no remorse for their crimes and even get a joy out of torturing, murdering, and raping. Don't believe me? Research the disease and even some of the famous ones like John Wayne Gacy and Michael Ryan. Being socially awkward to the point it's a disease is a minor disorder like social anxiety. But if you still disagree, why don't you go enter a room, oh say one with mid-evil torturer devices in it with a sociopath. That way you can either prove me right or prove me wrong.

Well look at it this way, he's still the same person either way! Sociopaths can't help how they're born. True they can't feel remorse or intense emotions, so they learn to mimic them. It can actually be very lonely being one, for example, they can't truly love their children in the same way you or I could, they see them as an extension of themselves. Plenty of narcisists kill themselves because they know they'll never find someone they believe is good enough for them, so even though it sounds douchey they are the ones who have to live with it. How about you talk to your fiance about it? If you're getting married you should be able to talk to him about anything. Best of luck =)

Actually, sociopaths are people who kill because they see no difference between natural death and murder. I think it's that, or what has been previously said. Not sues anymore.

Actually 60, sociopaths do kill. Want an example? Ted Bundy. He's a well known sociopath. He was smart and manipulative and could've gone great places, but he chose to kill. He didn't feel any remorse for it either.

It's more typical for a murderer to fit the profile of a psychopath than a sociopath. A lot of successful business people are diagnosed with sociopathy. They see others are expendable; only pawns to be used for their personal gain. If he really is a sociopath and he's expressed interest in marrying you, it's likely you might fit some sort of criteria he wants in a partner. Or you're just a stepping stone to a grand future he envisions... for himself.

105-is completely right, sociopaths don't have to be killers, they manipulate. Charles Manson was a sociopath who got people to kill for him (although he also killed) but a lot of sociopaths aren't killers. You just never hear about the ones that aren't..

The main argumentative differences between sociopathy and psychopathy is the controversial "nature vs nurture". Sociopaths are not born crazy, they are raised dysfunctionally and become "crazy" (nuture vs nature). If a child is raised in an unstable or abusive home they may very likely become a sociopath. They may never commit murder or anything close to it, but nevertheless, they only consider themselves and how the world affects them. Basically, if your fiancé is a sociopath, you need to break it off immediately, because you are a pawn or someone that provides some sort of convenience. He doesn't love YOU, he loves what you do for HIM. Knowledge bomb dropped!

^ But sociopaths cannot help that they can't truly care for someone. In a sense they may actually BELIEVE that they love that person. Sure, it may be for their own personal, selfish reasons to have their life be according to how they dream a life should be. Yet, in their head, they don't know that they technically don't love a person like normal people love. They believe it to be true with how they rationalize it in their head... So OP's fiancé can infact believe he loves her, even though his "feelings" on love are not like normal peoples, because this is how he has known "feelings" to be his whole life.

How do you know if you're a sociopath? Not feeling remorse for purely selfless reasons? I don't think I've ever felt guilty for doing something until someone starts screaming at me. Then again, I'm pretty sure the worst thing I've done is massacre Oakvale in Fable.

That depends on the type of sociopath. For example, I am a high functioning sociopath. I'm certainly not the nicest person and coupled with my Aspergers, I'm horribly socially retarded but I'm definitely not dangerous.

I hope you're a light sleeper OP. Perhaps some cold feet?

What do you expect when you're engaged to The Joker?

SystemofaBlink41 27

Where does it say her fiance is the Joker?

Are you the guy who went to break up with his abusive, controlling girlfriend and got engaged instead?

Sorry, the gender didn't show up. *crawls back into hole*

KM96 24

It was worth a shot! Thumbs up for that!

12 I'll get my Dockson. You'll be the badger that will kick the shit out of him.

allie4576 3

No it's a different person that was a guy

Good thing you found out beforethe marriage! Just be careful and watch him extra carefully from now on. If he seems a bit off his end then...I would say leave him but then he may go nuts. But hope you're safe OP! FYL

Op, as a fellow student of forensics, I advise you to watch him carefully. Or her, did check the gender. But don't break it off. Some people just have strange habits.

KM96 24

Thats very scary ... What are you to do now? :0

OhDearBetrayal 25

Her only option is to kill him before he kills her. It's the only way.

KM96 24

Okay - so running isn't an answer ?

OhDearBetrayal 25

16- Running means that he's still alive, and I imagine sociopaths to be a little close to zombies in that they continue to move toasted their prey, and the way to get rid of a zombie is by taking him down so I used comic book logic to answer this question because it never fails.

KM96 24

Jail I guess can't count either because they still get out … eventually. And he'll come after her !! (speaking theoretically - from what a sociopath would probably do...)

OhDearBetrayal 25

Evidently my autocorrect found toasted to be an appropriate fill in for towards.

Do you guys even know what a sociopath is? Because from your comments, I highly doubt that. Pfft.

22 - everyone confuses sociopath for psychopath, and psychopath for psychotic. It's one of my worst pet peeves.

21- your phone has a brain. You see, toasting zombies is a great solution to getting them off this planet.

21 - I thought you were going to go into zombies eating toasted brains or something. I was disappointed when I realized it must be an autocorrect :(

Hope it's a coincidence that every single one of his personality traits matches the one of a sociopath?

Well don't assume... If it hasent been a problem yet don't do anything, you can bend anything like that to fit anyone. If it becomes a problem, then suggest getting help, or if you absolutely cannot deal with it, then you can think about leaving him. But don't do it just yet.

That's cool just wait for him to kill you before you do anything about it. Sounds like an excellent plan.

I mean if he does other things. I admit that I don't know much about sociopaths, but I know in general it feels pretty terrible to have anything "wrong" with you mentally, so being rejected by his fiancée because he so happens to fit the description would feel horrible for him, when really he could be fine/able to manage it.

There is nothing wrong with being a sociopath! Why does everyone think so? A sociopath has no feeling of remorse or moral obligation toward others, how does this automatically make them killers? Does it makes them potential killers? Yes. But they will not murder you just because. Get it straight damnit.

119, True, they are only predisposed to it, but who the hell wants to take the chance? Besides, they're still assholes who shouldn't be in relationships with anyone who isn't like them. They're incapable of the same spectrum of emotion, which is a bit of a key thing when dating someone who isn't a sociopath...

tony1891 22

I dated a guy that fit the description of "sociopath". It took me 3 months to realise what exactly was the problem, and then a further year and a half to rid myself of him. Even after that, he continued to stalk me for a few months and threatened my friends. Not a nice relationship, nor a nice man. If he becomes very controlling or lies about things, rather ditch him. You do not want to be in an emotionally abusive relationship. Especially if it could turn physically abusive. From one woman to another, be darn careful, lady.

They say that every person changes around the right people, may be lucky and you might change him and him get a lot better at controlling things...or not and he could kill you in the night :) sleep well and try learn to keep one eye open :P

If her fiance is a legitimate sociopath, OP can't "change him"

Sorry 17, you cannot change personality traits, they are pretty much solid once you turn 18-20

Everyone wants to try to change their partners. Believe me it doesn't happen.

ifoundalaska 11

Actually not everyone wants to change their partners...