Today, my boss asked me if I could work on Valentine's Day because there was no chance of me having a date. She's right. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss asked me to pick up an extra shift. I said I couldn't because I have a date. He told me I didn't need to lie and to just say no next time. FML
Today, I had a meeting at work. My boss was going around saying that she tries to give time off to the other managers so they can spend time with their family and significant others. She looked at me and said she doesn't for me because I have no one special to spend time with. FML
Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML
Today, the coworker I have a crush on left halfway through the busiest shift of the week, and now I have to work it alone. I eventually found out that she left to go on a date with her new boyfriend. FML
Today, two days after sending her flowers for Valentine's Day, my dream girl asked me on a date. She didn't show up. Her boyfriend did though. FML
Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML
Today, my boss asked me to pick up more waitressing shifts because we are short-staffed. I already work seven days a week. FML
Today, I realized the reason I was asked to babysit 3 weeks ago for Feb 14 was because the old married couple with kids safely assumed that I wouldn't have a Valentine. FML
Today, my boss texted me to say the office was closed because of the snow. I begged him to let me go in anyway because I had nothing to do all day. I have no life, friends or hobbies. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's job to surprise her for lunch, her manager said she hasn't worked on a Saturday in two months. FML
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Top comments
ipwnallmen 10
Valentine's day is considered a big enough holiday for employees to have a day off? C: cool now if they could only do the same for Halloween
pensadoii 0
Hey, extra money for you, right? That was rude of her to say though =/
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Comments (85)
Sirin_fml 47
@Ajjas: True, but it's really just a $5 Monopoly note with "$500,000" written on it. @Mercy: You're still looking radiant. @Pendatic: Stop looking at Mercy like that. @Audience: I'd like to thank my friends, family, and all the bastards that said I'd never make it past The_Pleb. @God: I hate you, why weren't you there for me when I lost my family in that freak clown invasion? :'( @You: This is a private conversation, out OUT!
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
All this talk of camels, mercyFML versus Pendatic versus The Man versus invisible pineapple versus mercyFML, and skirt steaks are making me hungry. Same time, same channel, people. @Brave_Sir_Robin - You're a pathetic excuse of a sheep fluffer, and I know sheep-fluffing. Take your $500,000 in monopoly money, this ham sandwich (hmm... ham), and this parachute full of grape jelly.
Maxine17 8
My Valentine's day plans include going out and getting drunk, because it is also my 18th birthday and I don't need a man :D
CallMeHush 1
Go in and while you are there alone urinate around your bosses office.
Sirin_fml 47
I think we killed the site software's brain too, judging by all the missing comments >_>
swimspy 3
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Sirin_fml 47
Oops, I deleted my comment because one or two of the others showed up again. Pendatic hasn't snapped and started talking to himself again, people, don't worry :D
bfffness 0
tell her haha yea right ******, my girl is waiting for me at home in bed.
vampyre_girly 0
wait no maybe the boss is just bein rude
laurenjayne 3
ha ha :)
Ajjas013 6
LMFAOOOO pendatic. You guys are crazy. @BSR... Yo- Ah forget it. All hope is lost :( @pendatic, I think you caught it. BSR is contagious... @The general assembly: I'm back everyone. And I'd like to thank the academy. I've felt strangely proud of myself for achieveing something... I feel more popular on this website. Thanks to all in this thread. And a shame perdix was no part of this interbandying of words.