Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML
Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML
Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML
Today, it's my birthday, I once again had to remind my best friend of this fact, like I have every year for the past 20 years. FML
Today, the only person who remembered my birthday was my stalker ex. He left condoms, birth control, furry handcuffs, and a lingerie set in my mailbox, with a note saying to prepare for our anniversary. We went out for a week. In sixth grade. FML
Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I stumbled across my school bully on Facebook. She's a successful business owner and engaged to be married. I can't land a job and am hopelessly single. The b***h that served as the catalyst for my depression and suffered no repercussions is getting married on my birthday. FML
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
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Top comments
TheEpicFoo 0
That's one determined bully.
worldcupcheer17 0
call the cops he's a creepy ass stalker lmao
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Comments (390)
rhpsfan9 10
Well someone needs to grow up, id get your number changed.
Mahkymahk 0
I hate birthday punches
gregorygreg87 12
hahahaha
PinkHorset 5
Call the Cops! That should teach him
AstroWatermelon 0
probably gay or something
mcintosh123 15
He is not a bully but an ultimate stalker
Runninvegan 8
Grow some balls and bet his sorry ass your not 16 any more
sheethapins 13
Bet him on what?
cldean24 4
^^ ******* your mother.
Jesus_Christ69 0
^^ that was rude...
kidtoronto 5
just straight up fight him
a_nutritionist 10
wrong. bring a weapon. you need to win and you need to make him fear you. if this is a long term problem id be looking into long term solutions. train yourself and scare the absolute hell out of the guy, if you lose a fight he will simply believe he owns you. that is assuming you want to go the illegal route.
j_cat187 20
huff and puff and blow his head off
Notorious_Puppy 0
Hahah.
shelby_sevenfold 0
Well, if he calls you every year and still hasn't attempted hurting you, then he's basically all talk. I wouldn't worry. (:
green_eggs_and_h 0
Your a grown man at 34 (hopefully), I think it's time you started acting like one. Go **** that guy up, physically or by drowning him in lawsuits for harassment.
NightFoxx 6
that's the ticket..
green_eggs_and_h 0
It is the ticket. If he would have stood up for himself on day one of the harassment then he wouldn't have this problem. It's wimps like Op that qualify as "men" that are the root to a lot of problems these days because they set terrible examples for boys that should be men, but instead end up as ******* cowards their whole life, just like Op.
captainbj2 0
wow...maybe the Op is not a violent person....no reason to insult his manhood... not everyone jumps into being a barbarian
chengy4191 7
kick his ass!!!