By lahiros - 30/05/2014 22:05 - Australia - Bentleigh East

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my wife muttering "God, I want you so bad". Figuring she was either talking to me or longing for the second cumming of Christ, I turned over to see which. Turned out she was rubbing one out to some guy's Facebook photos on her phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 68 614
You deserved it 7 530

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Kinda creepy. She should just go watch **** or something.....

Looks like someone needs a better woman..


Ok that's it's. I'm coming bro. With a bat. I've got your back don't worry. That bitch doesn't deserve you man.

Yeah have a nice game of baseball! That aught to relieve some of that marital stress! No awful terrifying and crazy assaults

RenoTheRhino 30

Why'd OP say "cumming," instead of "coming?"

Llama_Face89 33

Well, to be honest, I really don't understand the "joke" myself. If it's a play on words then the "cumming" term would lead me to believe that the OP made her cum once and she's ready for round two or something that'll make her scream "Oh, God"! But since she wasn't talking to the OP at all-- then this does not apply so....who did the OP think she was talking to? I understand some claim to have a personal relationship with Jesus but this isn't what I learnt in Sunday class.

I agree that OP's wife is in the wrong, but do married men not fantasise about other women? They still watch **** etc

"Ok that's it's" means Okay that is it is common grammatical mistake or the first sign of ignorance in this comment?

Rubbing one out while you're next to her??? That's just wrong....

6demon6spawn6 12

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Demig0d6 14

The wife might be referring to me

ThatOneGuy719 16

Wow.. I'm sure she was bud.. Just keep telling yourself that, and maybe it will happen some day

I'm pretty sure guys do this kind of thing all the time? Married men may still watch ****, and try to keep it "secret" from their wives. They may also fantasise about women that they work with. Let's stop these double-standards please; I don't agree with either men or women behaving in this way, but before judging a woman, think how we are made to feel all the time when our male partners are pleasuring themselves over some random woman on Facebook...

**** is kind of a "meh" with marriage, because at a certain age sex happens less and less. But whacking it to someone's Facebook photos when you have a spouse is messed up.

I'll agree that a lot of guys do that, but it still doesnt make it right for either party. What OP's wife did is worse than just watching **** because she knows the person on facebook contrary to a pornstar which she has never met. It'd just make it harder to trust her. I understand what youre saying, just dont generalize it to all men.

Watching a **** with strangers in it isn't remotely the same as fantasizing about someone you actually know

It's not about gender, it's about a situation. Yes men and women both ********** to **** or fantasize about someone other then their partner, it's normal. But the wife was doing it in the bed with her husband right there, with someone she knows. If a man was doing that it'd be just as bad.

It's a pretty big step from masturbating about to the image of someone and having a physical or emotional relationahip with them. What's with the unequal treatment? Somehow, I don't think that some of these responses would be elicited if the masturbator were male.

This needs a follow up, I wanna know what she said and/or what happened.

Double standards my ass. most people would be just as shocked and doing the "no no, bad boy!" thing if a guy was doing the same thing. you know it.

r_bruce69 19

90 - the difference is, with ****, you don't actually know the people you're whacking off to. But if a spouse does that to somebody they know, then I infidelity is more likely

This goes for multiple posters here...but just because it's on Facebook, it doesn't mean she knows the person. By no means am I saying it's right or wrong (I believe couples are allowed to define those boundaries custom to themselves and their relationship), but my point is that this could very well be the same as ****; she could have just been looking at random profiles for all we know...which isn't much, at this point.

I agree #142. More likely than looking that pictures of someone she knows, was that she was looking at pictures on one of those ****-esque pages like "pictures google didn't want you to see" or "da booty" but a version for women. Or, just maybe, it was pictures of Ryan Gosling. We don't know.

ApparentlyNotEno 28

This is absolutely correct. I should know - what began as an 'innocent' crush by by (now-ex) fiancée turned into a full-blown romantic and sexual affair. It's time for a frank, open, and honest conversation with your wife, OP. She needs to come clean about what she's thinking and doing, and she cannot be indulging herself with fantasies of someone she knows. That is infidelity already in her heart, even if it hasn't happened physically yet. If she's not willing to re-commit fully to your marriage, then it's time to head for the door. Then trust, but verify. And if she balks at you verifying, she's hiding something, I'm sorry to say. She has lost the right to be blindly trusted.

WinterBlue42 22

You may be one of the smartest people on this website, bahaha.


Am i the only one that caught OP said "cumming" of Christ. ;)

Looks like someone needs a better woman..

I'm here to say one thing. I clicked on your profile for boobies. That is all

Briggsopposed - There are approximately 16,842,926,357 **** sites that are just as easy to find as this one. Go choose one. Now.

lexiieeex3 32

Like in the same bed? I'm sorry but that's ******* weird.

Kinda creepy. She should just go watch **** or something.....

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

if its allowed in the relationship. .

if your partner doesn't "allow" you to watch ****, they're a controlling ass

If she's not "allowed" to watch ****, I'm sure she's not allowed to get off to some guy's Facebook pictures.

that doesn't necessarily make them a "controlling ass". some people just prefer their partner to not look at other women/men like that. wouldn't it make you feel inadequate if instead of your partner coming to you, they turned to ****?i know it would me me feel bad about myself

Well generally men will turn to **** because when they come to the spouse for sex it's always a "No." Men are biologically programmed to always have more kids, however women's minds change after childbirth.

I know that my partner watches **** and I don't care. I watch it too. We even watch it together. Everyone looks at other people, it's really not a big deal when you know that your spouse loves you.

95, both men and women watch **** and both men and women sometimes turn down sex from their partners. It's a stereotype perpetuated through movies and tv that men have higher sex drives than women. It's been shown in a lot of studies that it's about the same for both genders, it just varies from person to person.

#65, my husband and I both watch ****. Both together and separately. everyone has needs and that is in no way a shortcoming of the partner. People need to be more secure with themselves, their partners, and their sexuality.

dannnngthatsux 19

Even if they offered and were turned down?

beamdaddy48 10

Oh man. Looks like you may have a cheater on your hands

SynysterNero 20

Would be easier if it was only a girlfriend. Since they're married it makes things more difficult so unless he can prove she slept with another man it's easier to try and work things out.

Little much for looking at pictures...

#14 tell that to the guy suggesting he "bring a bat" to help out Op. but I agree with you

Looking at pictures isn't exactly the same as looking at pictures and doing the devils diddly. They're similar at a glance, but I'd say there's a key difference

#12 How do you work things out when your wife is longing after other men? Sounds like her sights are elsewhere. You can't force someone to want you and if you could, why would you want that?

llamaslikesoda 21

#6 "Leave her" she did something that "every" mature man and women does occasionally, also, OP is a married man, do you think he wants to make tens of thousands to get out of a relationship with his loving wife? I wouldn't. I'd just warn her and tell her to at least not watch it right by me. I watch **** and my girlfriend really doesn't give a ****.

cjwayy 22

Oh jeez. I'm really sorry, but I did laugh when I read this. But at least she's just fantasizing and (hopefully) not acting on her fantasy...

I feel sorry for op! if his wife was looking at a **** star it wouldnt of been so bad, since they would never see them . but knowing that op's wife ,is getting off on pictures of a guy she knows on Facebook would make it hard to trust her .

Check if it was a celebrity first. If it was Ryan Gosling, it's pretty normal. But if it was some guy from the gym with Brad Pitt's face and Jesus' abs, time for some explanation.

#8 if it was Ryan gosling I'd leave her. He's So over rated...

Seriously if that was my soulmate (partner) whatever, I would so be out of there! **** that!!

#78 imagine working all day to wake up to that shit.. What a mess

An unknown **** star would be different.. Most Facebook friends are 'friends or friends of friends' **** Facebook

dannnngthatsux 19

Damn straight. You want ****? Go look at **** on a .....**** site! And unless she offered it first and was turned down, I'd be fighting mad.

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

the relationship may prohibit it..

relaxedninja 18

but yet it's ok for her to rub one out while looking at someone's facebook picture?

if it was okay, it wouldn't be an FML.

nightowl713 25

#22, you are pretty adamant about their relationship not allowing ****. I'm guessing you are either in a relationship that doesn't do **** and you're longing to watch it, you are just strongly against **** in general, or you are just really concerned that they may not watch it. Either way, we get your point, they may not watch ****, but, you don't have to comment the same thing on every single one.