Roommates from hell
Today, I got home to the smell of permanent marker and the discovery that my roommate's little sister had drawn flower petals around every polka dot she could reach on my walls. I just put up the wallpaper last weekend. FML
Today, I got home to the smell of permanent marker and the discovery that my roommate's little sister had drawn flower petals around every polka dot she could reach on my walls. I just put up the wallpaper last weekend. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my kids decided to draw on the walls with permanent marker, and now my house looks like a modern art exhibit. FML
Today, I discovered that my sister coloured in the pages of my college text books with Sharpie as "revenge." FML
Today, I left the living room for 3 minutes to make a coffee. When I went back, my 4-year old had found a permanent marker, God knows where, since I don't own a permanent marker. She'd then drawn on her face, the carpet, wall, sofa, both dogs and as an added bonus the TV screen. FML
Today, I came home from work to find my five year old daughter drawing unicorns on the wall. The same wall that I had to repaint last week because it had puppies on it. FML
Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML
Today, my daughter asked me if we could make sticker art. Of course I said it was OK so she went to get some stickers. I wondered where she was going when she walked into the bathroom, but I didn't ask. I left the room and when I came back, her paper was blank and my pads were stuck to the wall. FML
Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML
Today, my roommate got mad at me for putting away the tampons that were sitting on her desk. She rebelled by hanging hundreds of tampons dyed red from every surface in our dorm room. I discovered this while giving my mom her first tour of the place. FML
Today, after three weeks of hard work, I finally finished painting my room. Apparently my 6-year-old brother thought I wasn't done and that he should help me out. I now have little red handprints all over my white walls. FML
Today, I painted my daughter's bedroom. When I wasn't paying attention, the cat walked through the paint tray. There are now Barney purple paw prints all over the house. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TheCaramelKing 11
Make that bitch put up new wallpaper.
PandaSmile 24
Not gunna lie I would be all over that shit. Dots are always just asking for petals.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
addioty 19
Kids do the darndest things!
NeighSoulSister 6
I'm getting really tired of comments like this.
\ 28
If the roommate was there, it's her fault for not having watched over her sister.
addioty 19
Sorry. I guess I really wanted the top spot and became one of THOSE commentors. I apologize for the shitty comment :/
anonyeorge 3
did 1 really jus say "darnest" lol
ChevyRedneck85 13
#55- nope they said darndest
TheCaramelKing 11
Make that bitch put up new wallpaper.
diarheea101 11
maybe she doesn't know any better, but if she does than, yesh, she best.
PandaSmile 24
Not gunna lie I would be all over that shit. Dots are always just asking for petals.
Allennis44 16
Stay away from my dots
Legendslayer222 26
Why even bother with wallpaper when you have such a budding artist ready to do the decorating for you?
DocBastard 38
You shouldn't have put up polka dot wallpaper in the first place. You were begging for some little girl graffiti with that tacky shit.
TogeBara 12
you are a right dick aren't you
mif_fml 27
No, definitely a left dick.
DocBastard 38
TogeBara - You did notice my name, right? There is a reason it isn't DocReallyNiceGuy.
poppyseed420 9
Honesty tends to be brutal
lovethesidewalk 19
Your roommate should fix it. Make him/her redo the wallpaper.
gh0sthunter 6
probably because the higher she reached the higher she got.
SoliDSt33L 33
Sharpies haven't been made that way for several years.
japajo 2
Draw over it with dry erase marker...no more petals.
alshygirl 14
How would that help?
Treveyon56 14
Apparently 8 doesn't know what permanent means.
lexa1love 16
Depending on what the surface was drawing over a permanent with a dry erase will break down the permanent and allow it to be erased like a dry erase marker.
WiseGuy79 14
Polka dot wallpaper?? Serves you right for being stuck back in the 80s haha
tifdunc 14
Sue that bitch
DocBastard 38
We should all sue you for your dumbass comment.
DrownedMyFish 18
That would be a huge waste of time and money.
LowExpectations 30
I like how people think that a law suit will just print money for them. No, just no.
MikaykayUnicorn 36
"Today, my insane roommate tried to sue me because my little sister drew on her new wallpaper. FML"
monnanon 13
almost the definition of a frivolous lawsuit.