Intimacy: Today, I went to write "Happy Bday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's...

By anonymous - 24/06/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, I went to write "Happy Bday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's car windows to surprise her when she woke up. I was the one who got the surprise when I saw her, in her backseat, having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 895

You deserved it 3 723

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Same thing different taste

By SURPRISE - 10/06/2009 00:13 - Canada

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 615

You deserved it 6 819

By feelsbadman - 12/07/2018 05:00

Today, I decided to surprise my crush by wishing her happy birthday when she came out of the lift. Too bad she was busy giving someone a blow job and didn’t notice me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 891

You deserved it 610

By happybidet - 31/10/2016 13:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 708

You deserved it 880

By Blake Lawrence - 26/11/2012 18:59 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 813

You deserved it 2 613

By Toldyouso - 22/01/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 292

You deserved it 24 620

By Soline - 08/12/2008 12:05 - France

Today, I wanted to wake up my sweetheart with a surprise blowjob. He surprised me as well with a knee to the stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 224

You deserved it 9 034

By Anonymous - 23/11/2015 03:17 - Canada

Today, I drove 3 hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in 3 weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off and slammed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 786

You deserved it 2 373

By Anonymous - 19/12/2011 06:44 - United States

Today, I drove 45 min from my college to surprise my girlfriend with roses after she got off work. She responded by taking the roses, dumping them in her back seat, and speeding off because she couldn't miss Survivor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 085

You deserved it 3 330

Romantic moves

By Anonymous - 11/03/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my girlfriend with breakfast in bed. Instead, I spilled hot coffee all over her and the bed. We ended up spending the morning doing laundry instead of cuddling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 271

By Anonymous - 22/07/2013 08:47 - United Kingdom - Bury

Today, I was reassuring my girlfriend that I wasn't cheating on her because I was sneaking around. I'm actually just planning a surprise birthday party for her. During the reassuring, I accidentally called her another girl's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 948

You deserved it 30 278

OmniFML 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 12:05

Come back and write it with a baseball bat. It's the thought that counts. ;)

easylazy 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 18:22

You shouldn't jump to conclusions maybe she was having sex with YOU in the backseat DID YOU EVER THINK OF THAT?! No. THat's what I thought.

Comments

studentwoes 2

Wednesday 24 June 2009 14:40

I agree with the people that said you should have still written on the car, but dumped her with it. That really sucks! sorry!

irishdancer 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 14:41

Dudes... They are called Window Markers! http://www.crayolastore.com/product_detail.asp?T1=CRA+58-8166&. He didn't use REAL markers!

Derzimma 2

Wednesday 24 June 2009 14:57

The best thing you could have done would be to approach that car, start to write "Happy Bday" while both watch in shock. Then proceed to write "I love", hesitate a moment, continue with a "d you" and just walk away. Happy Bday, I loved you ;)

plexico 3

Wednesday 24 June 2009 15:03

So, who was the dude? Maybe I've been influenced by one of the earlier FML's today, but I think it would have great if you took a dump on her car. If you stood on the trunk and laid it right down there on the back window, that would've been perfect, especially if you got caught in the act by your girlfriend and the dude.