By copshop - 10/11/2011 11:40 - United States

Today, I was working the graveyard shift as a security guard. I fell asleep in my car doing paperwork around 2 am. When my supervisor came to check on me, he pounded on my window, wearing a "Scream" mask. I panicked and pepper sprayed him. Too bad my window was closed. FML
I agree, your life sucks 17 291
You deserved it 36 028

Same thing different taste

Top comments

blargheria 0

Supervisor of the year award goes to...

bigAC 6

you're like one of those Windex bird


Not really... Then again no one thinks well at 2 am...

Or when they're jolted into waking up.

Yeah, you wouldn't want to get fired. Even if you work at a graveyard.

68- Umm, hate to burst your bubble, but I don't think op works at a graveyard...

68 - graveyard shift doesn't mean he works at a graveyard, it means he worked at night.

No no no, obviously OP works at a graveyard, and he realized that the Zombies were coming, so he thought to him self "self, let's put on our big boy pants, and stop this zombie invasion right now by pepper spraying this asshole."

You are a disgrace to the English language. All of your comments on this FML story have been burried. Take a hint......

meidel 5
blargheria 0

Supervisor of the year award goes to...

Will Ferell! I can totally picture him playing OP's role in a movie.

KiddNYC1O 20

It's so damn hot! Milk was a bad choice.

truebrotrue 7

At least he has a sense of humor about it,op is off the hook

iEatWookies 1

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marzipanimal 15

What does that have to do with anything?.

iEatWookies 1

Real men don't use pepper spray obviously!

28, you are a twit. Go up to a policeman and say "you are not a real man".

iEatWookies 1

Look I'm sure he had a taser and everything. But he chose the pepper spray. That's all I'm saying haha

Are you serious. One it's called a graveyard shift so I'm already scared. Second he wore a scream mask and banged on the window waking him up. If that was me I would have BOOKED it out of there fuxk the spray

42, If you are in a situation where you could be sprayed, tasered, or shot....wish that you get sprayed. This is the best/safest option for you. But, feel free to yell at the person "is that all you got pussy?". Then hopefully you will have the pleasure of feeling over 1000 volts going through your body, with a few muscle spasms, before you fall in agony on the ground. Then, if you have enough strength left, scream out "be a man!", and you might hear a gun being shot. Then you can post an FML about it.

It's true, a real man would had a firearm and never fell asleep. Doesn't mean he wasn't a boy though.

iEatWookies 1

54 Put yourself in his position. He is woken abruptly to what (in the sudden shock) could be assumed to be a demon or something else. And he decided to try and pepper spray it. Yeeeaahh... Not seein that..

28, First of all, that must be some high end security business for you to assume that OP had a choice between pepper spray and a taser. It's also hilarious how you can use the "real men don't use pepper spray" line with a screen name like ieatwookies. Real men wouldn't post a comment as stupid as yours.

Ya because your trained to use spray over other methods. Why? Because like previously stated it's safer than a taser. Sometimes tasers fail sprays don't really and they are just as effective if not more effective because the target won't be able to see. If the person was still coming at the officer or guard THEN they would use a taser then a gun. So no he was smart and followed protocol. Think before you speak 3.

3 is pretty sexist. Using pepper spray, which ******* hurts like a bitch, is what op was trained to do. It has nothing to do with being a real man.

Op wasn't trained. Where in any type law enforcement does it train you to not be alert? Also tasers are safer and more effective than OC sprays. But they can cost over a grand, so youre more likely to see security with a gun rather than a taser. If you don't have what it takes to stay awake, get a new job. It could cost you a lot more than some painful tears some night...


Wow #3... and I'm guessing you're probably a guy. Without a girl. And obviously you're not a real man, cuz a real man's smart enough not to say something that dumb that's aimed at women. Jackass.

leadman1989 15

3 and 56 Have NEVER been maced (that sound manly enough?)! That shit HURTS! 56 - If you're tired YOU FALL ASLEEP there isn't really much you can do about that men are human too. I'm sure op won't listen to your dick headed advice.

111 people die from tazers and they can be fought off you obviously have no idea what your talking about. And if you're a security guard you need to go through some training if you're varying any sort of weapon so logically we can say OP was trained

111 - Since when are tazers safer? No one has ever died from being pepper-sprayed. Since 2001, approximately 508 people have died from tazers.

eviegirl247 0

After reading all these comments, I just want to know weather OP is a male or female...

you better run away, girls are going to beat your ass for being sexist

We security people have to do something to pass the time :)

FYLDeep 25

Your boss just had to punish you for sleeping on the job.

bigAC 6

you're like one of those Windex bird

It's not the birds that do that. It is the humans who run into the doors, and the birds just laugh.

So the supervisor is the bird in this situation

how did you pull out the pepper spray fast enough and not realize during the process that it was a mask...

I guess he just panicked and didn't really think. It's pretty funny though

I think the more important part of this story was that he didn't notice the window was rolled up thus spraying himself

Don't hate guarding the donut shop while the cops aren't around is tiring work!

sorry, I just don't get it. I can stay up for two or three days no problem. and sleep for a few hours.

Im pretty sure he knew it was a mask, but didn't know who was behind it, hence the panic and pepper spray.

remz89 3

51- well not everyone like you, nor do you know what stresses or situation he has to deal with throughout the day. So give yourself a cookie for being able to stay up for a couple of days.

give myself a cookie? wow, I know everyone can't do it.. I'm not explaining myself to some hater on the Internet your probably like, 12. now hop off.

*you're. And by the looks of your picture, it looks like you have given yourself enough cookies.

sushi_samurai 3

I feel safer now that I know alert, quick thinking security guards like you are on the front lines against crime. ;D

donnydrivetime 5

Your an idiot. Security guards don't fight crimes they dont do anything and then when something real happens they call the cops cause there nobody's

17-google sarcasm then you might understand what 10 was doing there

17 - you're* If you're going to insult someone on their intelligence, then spell the insult right.

Actually security guards protect private property.

17, you're an idiot. At my job the security guards are practically gods. We need them often, and they are beyond useful. Don't talk about what you don't know.

You're*, don't*, they're*, nobodies*, .* I just thought I'd get all of these corrections out of the way since FML loves people like me.