Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I ordered two double cheeseburgers from McDonald's and asked for one of them without pickles so they would think I was ordering for two people. Both burgers were for me. FML
Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while placing her order. I work as a Drive-Thru cashier at McDonalds. FML
Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML
Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered enough food for three people. The cashier asked if I needed extra napkins “for the group.” I panicked and said, “Yes, for the kids in the back.” There are no kids. Just me, alone, eating like a human trash compactor. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the cute cashier at my usual drive-thru. Instead of saying, "Thank you," I panicked and said, "I love you." Now I have to find a new favorite burger place. FML
Today, I ordered a plain cheeseburger. The cashier was confused, so I explained, "Just meat and cheese." When I got my food, my burger didn't have a bun. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
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Top comments
arhanes 0
why even lie about it. doubt she cared
happyk 0
The cashier might have thought they were for other people anyways. Why would the cashier care? It's none of her/his business.
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Comments (231)
coffeeatteatime 7
Five bucks says #50 is or was fat.
stephiefromfranc 0
i think the cashier doesnt care about what people eat or not
e2b_fml 0
thats disgusting. no offense
akallaan 7
FYL OP because if you eat like that, then in a few years you'll be paying money for heart surgery.
shanster 3
I'm sorry, if you eat one or two cheeseburgers I wouldn't necessarily call you a fat ass. Sometimes I haven't eaten all day and I'm starving and order two. But that FILLS ME UP to the point where I can't even move. HOW CAN YOU STUFF YOUR FACE WITH FIVE ******* BURGERS!!?!?!?!?! It's impossible to even imagine...but yet OP you've gone ahead and done it, and posted it for all the internet to see. Have fun stuffing your face with no girlfriend you ******* fatass.
lyndz_20 8
lmfao damn you cracked me up!!!
shanster 3
oh and @ 50....really you're going to talk about FML commentors judging someone who admitted to eating 5 burgers, have you even read this site? People bash everyone for far less and I think it's very reasonable to call someone a fattie if they just stuffed their face with that much calories. Just like it's reasonable for me to assume you're a pretentious prick from all the shitty comments you're making :)
yakyak132 0
ahhh WTF r u doing with 5 CHEESEBURGERS?!?!?
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for being a fat ******* piece of shit who would wolf down 5 cheeseburgers in one sitting. YDI for having a car. YDI for caring what the cashier thought; if you're going to be a fat ******* piece of shit, at least embrace it. YDI for even eating fast food; that shit is poison. Selenagirl, other biters, come on! If you're going to copy me, at least do it right! **** it, I might just go back to being mega-grammar/spelling/punctuation/diction/syntax-Nazi. That was more fun anyway, trolling people who actually respond rather than the OPs who just come here to whine but never answer commenters' questions OR my litanies of YDIs.
rwctkd95 0
lllllmmmmmffffaaaooooo!!!!!! hahahah nice, sound like big smoke from grand theft auto San andreas
wings00192 0
hah I've gotten more than that on my fast food trips. What's the point of lying about it?
Trollz4daLULZ 2
You fat ****. But at least you're honest.