Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ordered two double cheeseburgers from McDonald's and asked for one of them without pickles so they would think I was ordering for two people. Both burgers were for me. FML
Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while placing her order. I work as a Drive-Thru cashier at McDonalds. FML
Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML
Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered enough food for three people. The cashier asked if I needed extra napkins “for the group.” I panicked and said, “Yes, for the kids in the back.” There are no kids. Just me, alone, eating like a human trash compactor. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the cute cashier at my usual drive-thru. Instead of saying, "Thank you," I panicked and said, "I love you." Now I have to find a new favorite burger place. FML
Today, I ordered a plain cheeseburger. The cashier was confused, so I explained, "Just meat and cheese." When I got my food, my burger didn't have a bun. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
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Top comments
arhanes 0
why even lie about it. doubt she cared
happyk 0
The cashier might have thought they were for other people anyways. Why would the cashier care? It's none of her/his business.
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Comments (231)
minax24 0
maybe if u didn't eat 5 cheeseburgers a day u would have a girlfriend...
FriskyCoconut 0
they know your eating them all by yourself when you explain (falsely) that some are for someone else
nick3600 22
LOL FOREVER ALONE MUCH? LOSE WEIGHT FATASS
spartans916 1
sounds like a win. I love cheeseburgers
teacher25 3
for some reason, when I read this I got sad. i feel bad for OP.
sharkwkrox 0
Aw that's jut sad :(
miss2kute31 0
There's a lot of ignorance on these comments. Just because OP ate 5 cheeseburgers doesn't mean OP is fat. Some skinny people eat a lot of junk food but can never gain any weight. Gosh, some of you are really stupid to assume OP is fat because of that. And OP, why would you tell them it was for your girlfriend, that you don't have? Its none of their business who you order food for. Their job is to collect the money and give you food that's it.
summerhot_fml 2
awww im sorry
bms1996 12
that's disgusting.how can somebody eat that many cheeseburgers in one day?
cheetahcake19 0
You can haz cheezburger :)