Miscellaneous: Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends...

By FML - 15/05/2012 19:02 - Finland

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 975

You deserved it 8 595

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Asian - 07/02/2016 19:03 - United States - Clover

Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 944

You deserved it 1 866

By Anonymous - 23/06/2014 19:52 - United States

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 696

You deserved it 6 041

By Anonymous - 19/09/2016 17:29 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 843

You deserved it 867

By Anonymous - 06/04/2015 03:31 - United States - New Britain

Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 926

You deserved it 5 129

By Anonymous - 12/06/2016 12:37 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was trying to get my girlfriend to speak Mandarin. After speaking her first words and taking a break, she posted on Facebook: "I speak ching chong! :D :D :D" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 608

You deserved it 2 187

By Salaryman - 15/02/2009 06:21 - Philippines

Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 728

You deserved it 4 988

By Chin... uh.... - 10/05/2016 22:42 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 792

You deserved it 1 512

By ChickenBallsPlease - 28/01/2014 11:16 - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 581

You deserved it 16 651

Workplace etiquette

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 461

By J - 30/08/2016 17:20 - United States - Englewood

Today, I heard from multiple people that my girlfriend called me a dumbass because I apparently sent her "Good Morning" twice. We aren't even three full days into the relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 534

You deserved it 1 539

jessimica642 8

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:14

Lol that's so mean, but funny

Minna_fml 14

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:15

Then say nothing at all.

Comments

moviegirl6 5

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:20

It could've been worse. They could've taught you to ask for sex instead. :)

cathyfang1533 12

Wednesday 16 May 2012 15:09

That wouldn't have worked as well because the slang for sex in Chinese is chao fang which translates to cooking rice...so when you say I want to have sex with you, it comes out as wo shiang gung ni chao fang...I want to cook rice with you.

taytaylal 11

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:21

Great friends they are...

reddudeover 2

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:46

I didn't read your profile... I'm already stalking rubberduckie anyway.

Needafarm 22

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:21

maybe google translate would have prevented this, or rosetta stone.

dc4 12

Wednesday 16 May 2012 4:21

What does rosetta stone have to do with translations?

dc4 12

Wednesday 16 May 2012 5:46

So buy $300 software to find out how to say hello? All I'm saying is that there are easier ways

br0ccoli 14

Tuesday 15 May 2012 23:21

Next time, check online to check what you're saying. I know someone who told a girl "you have huge ****" in her language when all he wanted to say was "you're beautiful." If you don't check, you will get trolled.