Kids: Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't...

By Chin... uh.... - 10/05/2016 22:42 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 796

You deserved it 1 512

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/11/2011 05:23 - United States

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 685

You deserved it 4 761

By mustabeendrugs - 14/10/2013 01:14 - United States - Tucson

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 283

You deserved it 3 719

By kaichennnxx - 17/03/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 261

You deserved it 31 955

By FML - 15/05/2012 19:02 - Finland

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 979

You deserved it 8 599

By ChickenBallsPlease - 28/01/2014 11:16 - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 582

You deserved it 16 652

We all hate cold callers

By Adrian - 03/02/2022 14:01

Today, while working at my call center, I took a phone call. The guy on the other line just yelled "FUCK YOU!" twice at the top of his lungs before hanging up on me. But of course, the phone agent is always at fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 23/06/2014 19:52 - United States

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 699

You deserved it 6 042

By damniphone - 29/06/2013 05:31 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 109

You deserved it 8 715

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 17:38 - Ireland

Today, I realised I spend more time and receive more satisfaction talking on the phone with Chinese take away than talking to my wife in person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 168

You deserved it 23 572

By Anonymous - 23/04/2016 03:26 - United States

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, all because he heard me speaking Arabic. I was on the phone with my grandmother in Egypt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 856

You deserved it 1 696

fushengyuan 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:26

FREEEDOM!!!!!

A1NoSauce 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:33

It's okay, OP. They're still pretty normal by American standards.

Comments

fushengyuan 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:26

FREEEDOM!!!!!

Marshallino 21

Wednesday 11 May 2016 21:25

That was epic.

bheaze 20

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:29

Messing with foreigners 101.

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:30

Next time say ching chong ching ching shnabalaba ding dong.

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:35

No... Ok I'll see my self out. :(

dlToTlb 10

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:41

delete this to save me from clicking dislike

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:45

How do you delete comments on here I'm new to this

Hijacker101 12

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:31

They might have confused USA with Scotland.

BiGTiMeNeRD 29

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:16

I get it. The movie Braveheart.

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:29

nice reference

tj4234 35

Wednesday 11 May 2016 18:19

Nah, we don't phone people. We're too drunk for that.

A1NoSauce 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:33

It's okay, OP. They're still pretty normal by American standards.

embarass 14

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:42

Maybe they're making fun of America lol

Ben_Dover831 19

Wednesday 11 May 2016 11:56

They got it all wrong, they should have said MURICA!!!

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:31

MURICA FREEEEDOM!!

toolazytotype99 18

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:11

Maybe they just like Mel Gibson

ezrocks4u 29

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:19

'Least they didn't call you an "Amerifat"?

LycanGod 27

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:32

or American't even though AMERICA is a continent lol not a country

ABlindMan 17

Wednesday 11 May 2016 20:11

Can't tell if trolling or just stupid...

freddygasman 18

Wednesday 11 May 2016 20:32

maybe a bit of both

havahnegila 22

Wednesday 11 May 2016 12:33

At least it's not a bad word !

Keywords

Kids Money Health Work Christmas You're fired Customers Fat Bodyshaming Facebook Am I overreacting? Social Media Love AITA Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Miscellaneous Relatable Students Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 495

You deserved it 90

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 093

You deserved it 13 428

The Top

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 817

You deserved it 6 065

Today, I polished off the delicious iced gingerbread cookies in the pantry. I'd assumed the little flecks on them were speckles of broken icing, but as I went to throw the cookie bag away, a larva crawled out. The hundreds of flecks were moth eggs. I've been eating the cookies for three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 554

You deserved it 22 049

Today, I spent £107 filling wife's car up with fuel. When I get home she says "don't forget we have to fill my car up at Tesco at the weekend". "I've already done it at Asda earlier" I say. "You stupid dumb idiot" she says, "I wanted it filled up at Tesco so I could get Clubcard points". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 240

Today, I decided to show up early for work and really try to get off my manager's shit-list. On my way to work, my manager called to bitch me out for already being 30 minutes late. Yeah, I forgot about Daylight Savings Time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 182

You deserved it 12 439

Today, I was at home, my mom came and saw me holding what she thought was a glass of beer. She took the glass, threw it and slapped me for drinking it. I was drinking Apple Juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 699

You deserved it 3 184

Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close it because I'd seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 1 147

Same thing different taste

We all hate cold callers

Top comments

Comments