By Anonymous - Australia - Brisbane
Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML
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  wlddog  |  14

OP: "Oh you got a turkey last year? What did you kill it with? Ah, you shot it, thats nice. You'r an awesome hunter. I only used my right foot to kill mine."


F the op's life. They actually believe a turkey is a "stupid" animal. Turkeys are incredibly smart. They can also really lay a hurting on you... This one may have been attempting to spur the OP in the moment it "flew" at them. That can be really painful... I accidentally killed a chicken in this same way... He had cornered me and was spurring my legs, so I threw out my boot In defense and killed him by accident. I was just a kid. Knowing what I know now, I would have grabbed that little bastard and punted him clear across the farm.

  mansen  |  15

turkeys are evil. I am still terrified of them due to my father and uncles sick sense of humour when I was 8yrs old. Go ahead, go into the pen and pet the turkey that is as big as you! He is really friendly! Stupid naive me went in all excited to pet said turkey though asking aloud why his head was turning purple. Soon found out as I was running for my lil 8yr old life from a very very pissed off turkey. The adults? Nearly pissing themselves laughing. Me...scarred for life...turkeys are evil.

  kozzard  |  17

look up mouth open, mouth fills with water, too stupid to spit/swallow water, dies when lungs fill with water from trying to breathe. its not hard to figure out 86

  squishycat  |  6

I had a rooster like that when I was a kid! We nicknamed him Cujo, because he was so vicious, he was like a rabid dog (And, no, we never mistreated any of our animals, he was just psycho) We had to keep him outside the chicken run, or else he'd gore the hens. When some local cops showed up, who were friends of my dad's, they thought it would be a good idea to put him back in, as they thought he'd gotten loose. Two shredded uniforms and a trip to the hospital later...

By  RavenDesired  |  10

Omg, poor turkey, but LOL.

  klutz44  |  28

174 - if it's illegal to kill the bird anyway, he might as well dispose of the body so he doesn't get in trouble.

Dispose of it right into his belly. Mmmm turkey dinner!

  fml121785  |  14

Don't chickens run around after their heads get cut off sometimes? So he probably felt his broken neck for quite a while! Haven't you heard of Mike the Headless Chicken that lived for a year and a half after having his head cut off? Yea, I'm sure he was in quite a lot of pain.

  lilhellian  |  26

My question is how can something live a year an a half decapicated.. I know roaches live a week before they die of starvation.. But the chicken.. I require proof..

By  BlowinChronic  |  18

You should have just let it follow you and told everyone it was your pet turkey. Everyone would have thought it was hilarious, but instead you killed it and now look like an asshole.

  SApprentice  |  33

19- They're actually not that bad for pet fowl. I prefer a nice pet rooster, because the turkeys tend to be more standoffish, but really, they're not bad. Some of them like head rubs and things, or having their backs scritched at. They just need a little bit of space, a nice nesting area, and a sincere promise to never eat them and they're happy.

  23Z9TZO  |  18

Thanks Captain Hindsight :D