Today, I was watching a beautiful flock of birds flying overhead while walking in the street. The guy next to me was lucky enough to catch bird poop with his forehead. I was lucky enough to get distracted by it, trip, and break my ankle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML
Today, I lost my balance trying to get my bag out of my car. In doing so, my lips came in contact with some bird poop. FML
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
Today, I was walking down the street when a pigeon flew into my head and got caught in my hair. To make matters worse, a group of kids thought it was hilarious and started filming me with their phones while I screamed in terror. FML
Today, I walked out into my backyard. As I did so, my dogs ran past me, slamming the sliding door off its track. I went to catch it, and knocked the bird cage over. To complete the fumble, as I turned to catch the bird cage, I stepped in a dog turd. I wasn't wearing shoes. We're all okay, but… FML
Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML
Today, I tried to help a bird who had broken his wing. I walked straight into a door while looking down at him in my hands, and ended up all but breaking his other wing. FML
Today, while rushing to work, I tried eating a yogurt while walking. I tripped on absolutely nothing, flung the spoon behind me, and somehow launched the yogurt straight up. It landed squarely on my head, and it looked like a bird had shat on me. FML
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Top comments
dblogic 19
So I guess this is the first time literally being shit on is worse than the alternative? Ouch! I hope you heal quickly OP!
PrettyKitty66 0
I
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Comments (9)
Xelabasat 14
I guess you're shit out of duck
Phxlife602 9
Sorry to say but s@$! happens. I hope you get better and always be cautious around your surroundings
moondoglou420 17
Man, you really dodged the bullet on that one!
Mudge 11
today, I was watching an amazing flock of birds when a big dollop of bird poop landed on my head. if that wasn't worse enough, some jerk started ignoring where he was walking and began to laugh at me. FML
species4872 20
Caught a lucky break.
polsen4273 8
Somewhere on that street, under an overhang, someones day was made.
PrettyKitty66 0
I
dblogic 19
So I guess this is the first time literally being shit on is worse than the alternative? Ouch! I hope you heal quickly OP!