Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old sister, naked, streaming herself eating a banana. FML
Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML
Today, I woke up with a huge boner. My girlfriend saw it, rolled her eyes and said, "Not a chance." FML
Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML
Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Today, while rushing upstairs to have sex, I tripped on the stairs and rammed my naked boner into the edge of the step. All my wife could do is laugh at me. Now it even hurts to pee or put my trousers on. FML
Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML
Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML
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Top comments
Mischief109 11
Get ready for Wincest comments galore...
dixiefoxx 22
Never look someone in the eyes while you or they are eating a banana..
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Comments (247)
Hydromicide 6
That's disgusting, you seem pretty desperate OP, not gonna lie...
florido_fml 10
Hey 28 too funny ha
unknown_user5566 27
Mother of God. What is wrong with people tonight? Is the reply button that difficult to find?
eddeeezzyy 19
44, it's Friday night, the second most popular day to get drunk, please excuse us.
PyroAngel1821 13
I think some of them are doing it on purpose. But you never know..
martin_martian7 11
Awkward!
AholeCop 11
Blame it on the pants pleat.
knmoon 8
Ewwww that's disgusting!!!! Why!!!!!
HighlandShadows 48
Sometimes they just can't help it, it doesn't even have to be a sexual thing... a guy can get hard if the wind blows the wrong way.
isaacdoe 4
That's so ****** up
frdmnky12 6
44, i think it's to piss you off, or because they know the chances of being replied to are smaller now. ;D
unknown_user5566 27
... >:|
Quest_ 13
Should have started sensuously eating a burger and watched her eyes glaze over. SHE KNEW WHAT SHE WAS DOING.
tjgarrick 8
Awesome answer!
afropuffjake 9
Your girl SERIOUSLY needs to take care of you!!
CharresBarkrey 16
His hands aren't broken.
SluggerJ 7
That his sister sicko are you from the south? (don't mean all stat's in the south)
rightspark 7
You were just thinking about a girl doing that to you, not particularly her I am sure because you would not have posted this comment on here and out of respect for her You waited until she left before you stood up(no pun intended lol)