Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, my Breaking Bad-obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks" during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML
Today, I tried turning on my boyfriend by sending him naughty pictures and texts, describing in detail all the things I was going to do to him when we have the house to ourselves this weekend. He responded by quoting that crappy movie 'The Room', saying, "Oh hi doggie!" FML
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied, "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Today, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying, "Come over and do me." He never responded. FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
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Top comments
hghrider123456 9
He basically told you to go **** yourself....
norwegianboip 17
Well.. It is the finale ..
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Comments (314)
imdabess 9
it was super important. coulda been nicer but still. best show on tv doe.
WinterSanctity 21
You're his girlfriend. You should know how much Breaking Bad is addicting. Why weren't you there watching it with him? My boyfriend got me thoroughly addicted to the show. We both know that neither of us would have done anything but watch the show, so we got pizza and watched the marathon all day. I agree, he didn't have to he so blantanly rude and disrespectful when saying no, but you also shouldn't have asked him to choose between you or the series finale to his favorite show. Even if he records it, he'd probably hear a bunch of spoilers from other people before he got a chance to watch it.
ao34501 5
He turned you down for sex once and you say fyl because he wanted to enjoy a TV show's finale without having to worry about people spoiling it. I'm sure you turned him down before for some reason. It is just one time. Sure, he wasn't super nice about it, but you have the option to leave him. He could have skipped an anniversary dinner, cheated on you, or given you an std. Relax you can have sex another time.
NSN82 13
She's not complaining about being turned down! She's complaining about the way she was turned her down. I'm sure this FML wouldn't even be here if he had said "Sorry babe. The series finale of Breaking Bad is on tonight and I really don't want to miss it. Maybe tomorrow?"
wiccaantje 21
Maybe it's the way they constantly talk to each other? It sounds jokishly. I talk way ruder when I'm joking with my boyfriend. I don't think he would have dared to use this language if they didn't use it before. I think she got pissed off at the no sex and couldn't take the joke because she was angry. She doesn't seem like a very conciderate person if she is trying to get him to come over on the day (and time) of his favorite show's (likely assumption) final episode.
Waredo_Dyrge 11
While he could have been nicer about it you should have known better.
swedeNix 13
Couchtuner has them all whenever u want for free
Guilty_Turtle 6
Well all bad things must come to an end...
BrownBallSack 9
Great finale :) Was nice way to end the sorry! He did the right thing to tell you he couldnt go but there are better ways to say it than the way he said it.
NSN82 13
Just be glad the show is over. I'm sure you're just as sick of hearing about it as I am. Now your boyfriend will have more free time to do stuff with you.
Kamon97 23
Hey she made the mistake of dating a douche either she dumps him or faces the consequences :p
Ziggy122 15
Breaking Bad must be a REALLY good show if he turned down sex for the finale.