Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Steamy
Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML
Remote sex
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, my Breaking Bad-obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks" during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML
Talk sexy to me
Today, I tried turning on my boyfriend by sending him naughty pictures and texts, describing in detail all the things I was going to do to him when we have the house to ourselves this weekend. He responded by quoting that crappy movie 'The Room', saying, "Oh hi doggie!" FML
Dirty talk
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied, "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Do me
Today, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying, "Come over and do me." He never responded. FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Top comments
hghrider123456 9
He basically told you to go **** yourself....
norwegianboip 17
Well.. It is the finale ..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (314)
Korra_fml 23
one day the roles will be reversed: boy "hey babe, wanna come over and have a little fun?? ;)" you "srsly?!? u know how much i absolutely CANT miss *insert show here*... u got 2 hands, y dont u just ******* use one..."
The_Diesel4 1
@96 well a relationship Should be about more then sex.. If you're getting pissy about him not wanting to do it with her that's kinda odd or it's happened to you before. Throwing this out there, why doesn't she watch it with him?
ChibiChibi_fml 27
I find it weird that asnakelovinbabe got so many up votes since only one person in this thread had said there was anything wrong with the OP's boyfriend turning him down beyond the way it was worded. Up until her comment, disregarding the ones specifically about the show Breaking Bad and watching it, the main complaints were how he turned sex down not that he turned sex down.
thatotk 14
Breaking Bad? Multitasking is out of the picture. Couldn't keep thee ol' pecker up after watching this finale.
kra1985 8
Ever heard of DVR??!! Plus breaking bad is not that great! Good show but not as good as great sex!
Komaeda 14
Man, how rude.
inolongercare 19
In his defense it is the final season..
SmokinGuns 13
No TV show should get in the way of you and your bf. that's immature and rude. I'd dump him.
wiccaantje 21
I'd dumb her. Final episode of (probably) his favorite show and she's trying to hook up then? Either she doesn't give a shit about what he cares about, or she's an underage girl that still thinks the entire relationship revolves around the girl.
an3ph 20
I believe it's time for Breaking Bad relationships. Badam-tish!
asnakelovinbabe 16
"A relationship should be more than about sex" I just need to address that phrase... 9 times out of 10, this phrase is a cop out. Most who say this are girls who aren't getting any enjoyment about sex because they aren't communicating to their partner what feels good. I have heard so many women utter this phrase as they roll their eyes. (I must admit I have not heard a man say this lol) Let's be realistic here... USUALLY, I am not saying in all case but USUALLY part of a HEALTHY serious relationship/marriage is sex... GOOD sex. It's never ALL about sex... But if one or both person's sexual needs aren't being met, something isn't right. And that can cause tension and one or both parties to lose interest. Sex is an important part of a healthy relationship. A friend of ours is currently in a relationship where now that they've been together over a year, she just never wants to have sex. Ever. They haven't done it in months. Yet she expects him to just be okay with it. That is not healthy. It's not the only component, but it is a major one and anyone who denies that is either single, bitter, or both. Having said that, I am sure OP will shrug this off and realize it isn't a big deal for someone to occasionally think something else in their life is more important than sex... Yes, sometimes even a MAN can turn down sex! Now that you mention it I was also wondering... Why isn't she watching it too!? You watch it together, then snuggle for a while... Then sex. Everybody wins!!!!