Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Steamy
Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML
Remote sex
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, my Breaking Bad-obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks" during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML
Talk sexy to me
Today, I tried turning on my boyfriend by sending him naughty pictures and texts, describing in detail all the things I was going to do to him when we have the house to ourselves this weekend. He responded by quoting that crappy movie 'The Room', saying, "Oh hi doggie!" FML
Dirty talk
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied, "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Do me
Today, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying, "Come over and do me." He never responded. FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Top comments
hghrider123456 9
He basically told you to go **** yourself....
norwegianboip 17
Well.. It is the finale ..
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Comments (314)
DevilsMetsGiants 30
Breaking Bad > Sex
Palirose 22
I actually just finished watching the show with my boyfriend. I absolutely love it. Also just because you want to have sex doesn't mean your partner has to always drop their own plans to meet your needs.
JoelsLastNight 18
Honestly i have a girl and we never have sex and the only time is when i ask and she says okay gosh. So i would have said yeah sure be right over but even if i would have still gone over what a dick lol
pazuzus_intern 10
What the hell are you talking about?
acroluvr98 11
But I mean, its Breaking Bad...
babyblueyes 27
Seriously, breaking bad was on, try to be a little less selfish! Lol
jw90 18
Let me clarify that my comment was obviously sarcasm.
rhcpgurl 18
Whats your problem!? Breaking Bad finale was today! YDI! I'm a woman and even I would dump you for intervening with me and Breaking Bad. I have no sympathy for you.
lil_mars 1
Sounds like a total asshat. Sorry, OP. Please tell me you had an awesome comeback for his shitty attitude! Btw has no one heard of reruns? I highly doubt there was only one airing of the BB finale.
Waredo_Dyrge 11
Free advice for all the guys saying "What a horrible boyfriend. You should dump him. I'd gladly have sex with you over some dumb tv show.": Whiteknighting will not get you pussy. Enjoy your hands.
pazuzus_intern 10
Because I'm sure they're are absolutely no guys in existence that would rather have sex than watch breaking bad, none at all.
shy_and_bubbly 6
It's safe to say the op will probably say the same thing when her boyfriend asks to ****.but man in all serious is breaking bad really a good show? Never seen it. :)
Waredo_Dyrge 11
I think it's a great show, myself. I wouldn't have been quite as rude as OP's bf, but I still would have told her no if she asked me to come over when Breaking Bad was on. I wouldn't tell her no if she wanted to come over, but she had damn sure better not bug me while it's on.