Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, I was rushing around like a lunatic trying to get my shit together and knocked on my son's door a few times. The fourth time I did it, he shouted at me to just fuck off already because he’s trying to have a wank. Oops, and TMI son, TMI. FML
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Top comments
GIRAFFES 0
Wow. I blame public schools? Harrr. :B
amyzerz 0
What sort of vulgar environment are you raising your kids in? Or is it simply the way our schooling system has come to nowadays... FYL & YDI.
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Comments (880)
ohxberlin 0
that's horrible. i thought my 8 year old cousin saying "bastard" was bad. i didn't even hear the word **** till i was like 12 or 13!
AdamGD 0
Holy crap! I didnt start cussing until i was like 13. But nothing like that! I know kids are hearing things like that cuz i once knew a 5 year old who said **** but he didnt know what it meant or that it was bad
BulldogQB4 0
Cannot believe the amount of people who say FYL. Really you are a terrible parent if you can just blame school and TV and let this garbage slide. Me being the Christian teacher I will become, swearing ain't allowed. I coached soccer this spring and it was three laps and 40 push ups if you so much as uttered a swear. I get excited when I coach and I have a mouth on me when I get mad, so I tripled the punishment for me. Set an example also have incentives (like no conditioning the next practice) if there is no swearing.
maupa 0
parenting fail?
OMGQueenB 0
I hate how everyone's assuming that it's the parent's fault. The parent is unlikely to post it as a FML if s/he is aware it's his/her fault. FYL, but make sure you tell your kids NOT to say that kind of thing.
martron3000 5
That what happens when you let your kids watch the Jerry Springer Show! lol
baby_love 0
i say you beat them :]
fmlAllStar7274 0
How does an 8 year old jack off?
sdawl 0
thats what you get for talking around your kids like that so yFuckingDI
Lolitajv 0
That's kid of awesome. However, if that was me when I was a kid, I would have gotten beaten for using that language.