Kids: Today, while hiking in the mountains in North Carolina, I finally... - FML

By anonymous - United States

Today, while hiking in the mountains in North Carolina, I finally got to the deer I had been tracking for almost an hour. I was watching it from about 10 feet away, and enjoying every moment. Within a few seconds, my niece yelled from across the river to ask if I had found it. It ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5502

You deserved it

971

Tweet

Share

Understandable

This Charming Man

Whatthefuckaburger

By ponyboy - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she suspected me of cheating. She thought I was cheating because she caught me sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was sneaking out to plan my proposal to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41235

You deserved it

4166

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - San Francisco

Today, I bought $250 worth of groceries and was feeling rather good about myself because it's the first time I've been able to do so in months. When I returned home I found my fridge/freezer broken. Most of the food I bought was dairy or frozen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50986

You deserved it

3790

Tweet

Share

By smalls727

Today, I was at orientation for my new job. There were only 6 other people in the training. Throughout the whole entire training, I kept smelling cat urine and moving further away from the other person. Only to get in my car and realize my cat peed in my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9591

You deserved it

2341

Tweet

Share

By Blerp

Today, I got chewed out by my boss for not doing my job. Turns out what's described in my job description, contract, and job title isn't my job. My real job is outlined in the footnote of my contract. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6673

You deserved it

570

Tweet

Share

By gr8terevil - United States

Today, the men clearing the walkway outside my dorm room, with a snowblower didn't realize that my window was open. I looked over from my computer to see snow shooting in, covering my clock, closet, and radio. And now it's melting. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41907

You deserved it

16869

Tweet

Share

By anonymous - United States

Today, I was in agonizing pain and couldn't move. My parents said they couldn't take me to the ER until the football game on TV was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35806

You deserved it

3311

Tweet

Share

By IceWrath - United Kingdom - York

Today, my elderly dad learned how to use Facebook. He now spends most of his time messaging me about his meals, his bowel movements and his foot fungus. He's now learning how to use Skype. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25021

You deserved it

2403

Tweet

Share

By Alpha - Estonia

Today, while I was meditating in my room, I started to hear strange sounds. I was thrilled and thought I was having some sort of profound experience. It turned out my brother had tuned in to South Park out in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10499

You deserved it

31690

Tweet

Share

By Lonely626

Today, while talking with a coworker, we discussed a weekend home invasion scenario. It was then that I realized my social circle is so non-existent, that my job would notice I'm gone before my friends would. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11861

You deserved it

1242

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that the love of my life, who I've been going out with for two weeks only, asked me out because he lost a bet. Apparently I'm the punishment for not being able to eat 10 hot dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56083

You deserved it

12801

Tweet

Share

By fuck fof and die dad - Germany - Kiel

Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39405

You deserved it

9382

Tweet

Share

By bruh_im18 - United States - Metairie

Today, I found out the 28-year-old I am dating is actually 48. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12931

You deserved it

2546

Tweet

Share

By fat teen - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11441

You deserved it

2299

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents invited all their kids and grandkids to join them on a vacation trip to the mountains; all their kids except me, that is. I'm not invited. But they did invite my ex-husband. And his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48419

You deserved it

3365

Tweet

Share

By

Today, my flatmate wanted to introduce me to his new friend, saying we'd, "get along great". Within the first half hour, she'd used the word "lit" eight times, and dabbed four times. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7093

You deserved it

673

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - Australia - Boondall

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

I agree, your life sucks

61922

You deserved it

6183

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I filled up my company car with my own debit card, instead of my fuel card. It was the last £40 I had for the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks

21884

You deserved it

6953

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous

Today, the gas company had to be called into work for a possible gas leak. The pipes are fine. I had White Castle for dinner last night. I'm the gas leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3757

You deserved it

1187

Tweet

Share

By ihatemylife - United States - Naperville

Today, at 24, I still can't grow a single bit of facial hair. Well, at least not on the right side of my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30296

You deserved it

2404

Tweet

Share

By my face though - United States - Kettle Falls

Today, I had to leave class early due to a profusely bleeding pimple on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20751

You deserved it

2437

Tweet

Share

By Noname - United States

Today, I had a gymnastics meet. I thought I was done with my period, but when I was up on the beam warming up my routine, one of my coaches called me down and told me that I apparently wasn't. My coach goes around asking my teammates moms if they had any pads. My dad caught this all on tape. FML

I agree, your life sucks

75713

You deserved it

7645

Tweet

Share

By _The__Doctor_ - United States - Venice

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42156

You deserved it

3694

Tweet

Share

By yeyt209 - United States - Bismarck

Today, I passed out in my car in a McDonald's parking lot. I got woken up by a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19525

You deserved it

10054

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me for her boss. The same boss that, two weeks ago, caused her to come to me crying because he was sexually harassing her at work. When I told her I'd intervene, she told me she'd handle it. I guess she certainly did. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43534

You deserved it

2442

Tweet

Share

By yek - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, I'm spending Christmas Eve at the hospital. Why? Because when I blew my nose, a ball of flesh connected to a tendril of skin shot out, and it wouldn't go back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22549

You deserved it

1595

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Chicago

Today, my fiancé's best friend, who will be our best man at our wedding, decided to confess his feelings for me and tell me how he's always dreamed of us eloping together. The wedding is going to be awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50763

You deserved it

3307

Tweet

Share

By Ariel_Mariaa - Canada

Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29459

You deserved it

4264

Tweet

Share

By bridezilla - New Zealand - Auckland

Honesty

Today, I was trying on wedding dresses with my future sister-in-law who is a little bigger than me. We tried on a similar dress and she said it looked better on me because I'm skinny. Instead of saying, 'No way' or 'It looks great on you', I accidentally said 'Yeah, I know'. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20394

You deserved it

35126

Tweet

Share

By angry - United States

Today, I went to go get a new ID because my wallet was stolen, which had my social security card in it as well. I found out that to get your ID you have to have your social security card, and to get your social security card, you need your ID. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57969

You deserved it

8667

Tweet

Share

By parched - United States

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33685

You deserved it

3251

Tweet

Share

By RoxMySox - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. I got into it because I noticed a flashy new sign on the highway that read "Being an attentive driver prevents car crashes". Thanks for the notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28365

You deserved it

6686

Tweet

Share

By funnymanjoe - United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37651

You deserved it

5726

Tweet

Share

By Me

Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28865

You deserved it

5707

Tweet

Share

By WhataStrangeTripThisIs - 23/12/2020 22:58

Slow

Today, my fiancé told me he loved me just the way I am. But admitted he wished he had met me before my head injury that made me "slow." FML

I agree, your life sucks

942

You deserved it

78

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 9/12/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes

Bodyshaming

Today, my coworker doesn't want to go to lunch with me anymore, after I lost a load of weight in lockdown and she's still "overweight." Apparently, I've "changed, and not the same person." FML

I agree, your life sucks

647

You deserved it

50

Tweet

Share

By americanized - Denmark

Today, I helped two people find the central station on my way home. As a thank you, they mugged me and stole my wallet and iPod Touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32928

You deserved it

4136

Tweet

Share

By me - Canada

Today, my exchange student asked me for a ride to a party at a friend's house that I didn't know about. When I said, "Oh, just let me change", she replied, "I just need the ride, you're not invited." FML

I agree, your life sucks

34308

You deserved it

3212

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous

Burden

Today, after a fight with my parents, I told them I was running away. They said, "Good. Now we have less to pay in child support." FML

I agree, your life sucks

1119

You deserved it

760

Tweet

Share

By inked - United States

Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15340

You deserved it

31146

Tweet

Share

By geli

Today, while at the public swimming pool, I gave my 2-year-old daughter a piggy back ride in the pool. We were having fun until I realized she had untied my swim top. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13691

You deserved it

1412

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By Tripartita | 44

#7383007 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:58

Today, while walking around my home, I spent an entire hour afraid I was being pursued and dreading every second of it. I was starting to feel better when a small furless biped shrieked its battle cry at me, causing me to run like a coward. An even bigger one ogled me the whole time. FML

By Scarylizard1798 | 23

#7382993 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:19

Nature vs Niece

COMMENTS

By chirstinap325 | 21

#7382988 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:01

I think your niece was trolling you.

By maritime1992 | 5

#7382989 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:03

well, it wanted to live. it's not just going to stand there

Reply

dunicha | 20

#7382992 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:17

I don't see anything there that implies they were going to kill it. OP says they were just enjoying watching it. Even the last line says it ran away rather than it got away.

Reply

Oceanborn_fml | 24

#7382995 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:32

yea it says they were hiking, not hunting

Reply

lonelyny1945 | 8

#7383010 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 2:20

Well yeah, but the deer doesn't know that he is a hiker and not a hunter.

Reply

Devolution | 8

#7383014 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 2:54

The deer doesn't know much of anything let alone the dichotomy of humans

By FrozenMusic | 26

#7382990 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:06

At least you got to see it for partial time than not at all (:

By Laphog | 17

#7382991 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:15

You should send this to Louis CK. He would have the utmost sympathy for your unfortunate deer watching mishap.

By Scarylizard1798 | 23

#7382993 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:19

Nature vs Niece

Reply

Tripartita | 44

#7383004 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:45

Who ever wins gets to face off against Nurture.

Reply

Tripartita | 44

#7383013 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 2:52

*Whoever

C'mon, Trip.

By Pogo4lyfe | 1

#7382994 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:31

You're hiking in the mountains in North Carolina. Your life is awesome!

By RichardPencil | 30

#7382999 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:38

It sensed the ol' Good Human-Bad Human trap!

The Good Human wins its trust and the Bad one shoots it. Not today!!!

By Jay18 | 22

#7383001 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:39

at least you enjoyed it

By Tripartita | 44

#7383007 - Tuesday 3 January 2017 1:58

Today, while walking around my home, I spent an entire hour afraid I was being pursued and dreading every second of it. I was starting to feel better when a small furless biped shrieked its battle cry at me, causing me to run like a coward. An even bigger one ogled me the whole time. FML

By Teckzilla | 21

#7410397 - Friday 6 January 2017 23:40

So many problematic nieces recently.