Today, I had to get stitches on my foot and was then forced to wear a plastic bag on my foot while showering. The plastic bag made me slip in the shower and had to go back and get stitches in my forehead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Today, I walked outside, slipped, busted my head, and had to get 7 stitches. Turns out my son thought it would be funny to spray the sidewalk with water last night so it would freeze. He got a laugh, and I spent over $100 on the stitches. FML
Today, mere hours after getting my knee out of plaster and walking normally again, I stepped on a giant nail, which went through my shoe and came out of the top of my foot. Surgery on the splintered bone, bandages, and no putting weight on it for at least 2 weeks. Here I go again. FML
Today, my friend hit a glass with her arm, so I dove to try and catch it before it hit the ground and shattered. I hit my head against the table, giving me a nice gash that needed stitches. The glass was actually plastic. FML
Today, I had to be go to the ER after I fell on a rake. After having stiches put in, my Mom wanted me to go to the store with her. My friend saw me at the store and thought it would be funny to rip off the band aid because she thought I was hiding a zit. She ripped out my stitches. FML
Today, I stepped on a piece of glass and sliced my right foot open. Hobbling to get my first aid kit, I tripped and stepped on a pair of heels, and sliced my left foot open. FML
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, I was riding my scooter at a skate park. I was wearing a helmet, but I got hot, so I took it off. Within the next minute, I fell off my scooter and cut my head open. I had to get four stitches. FML
Today, after spending the day at work avoiding all hard manual tasks that may harm me, I had a table dropped on my foot. I broke my toe, split my nail and had to get a tetanus shot. I was avoiding injury as I was supposed to be performing in a figure skating exhibition this evening. FML
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Top comments
toooldforthis 19
Do you have to wear a plastic bag on your head now?
DontClickOnMe 28
You should've tried and stuck your foot out of the shower. Oh well, but I hope you get better soon, OP!
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Comments (107)
firefighterjohn 9
finally a true fml. sorry op
Shoone_fml 5
Thanks man.
funnyguy2697 6
now you need a plastic bag on your head when showering??
LowLives 9
Soo...now you have to wear a plastic bag over your head?
laevatin 2
Don't shower before you break anything else lol. Worse case scenario wash yourself with a wet towel and sit down somewhere save. I feel sorry for u OP.
kissie87 4
Lmao it seems like you are Made out of sugar because you crack easily .
footslave 0
You could've stood on my face or my neck or my back that would fix your problem.
ruairiwright 0
For the love of god, DONT put a plastic bag on yur head while showering now, or you might get a little more than stitches...
Maddie_Cakes 3
Ouch! Sounds painful. Hope you get better soon .-.
linkinpark98 24
This sounds like an idea for a new horror movie character. "Stitch". Yeah, that seems to fit the description nicely.
zach8771 3
And the Canucks lost....