Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
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Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
Today, my wife was in labour and bouncing on her inflatable ball to relieve the pain when it popped. This thing has lasted her entire pregnancy and it chose to burst now, sending her crashing to the floor groin first while 8 cm dilated. And as the husband, it is of course all my fault, you bastard. FML
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
Impregnate her.
XxHoPPoxX 8
Balls to you
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Comments (260)
HandsomeRatch 20
I never really understood why people keep comparing the pain of giving birth and the pain of getting your nuts kicked. You can't compare the two. Stop ******* debating which is worse, it's not like the other gender can feel the other kind of pain.
Autistic_Slut 9
actually getting kicked in the nuts has been proven to have more pain than giving birth
Michael_92 20
Idk i'm a dude but I would have to think giving birth hurts more. Not only are big things coming out of small places but the pain is for far longer.
alfred07 18
She cared about the argument enough to kick you in the balls? I don't think you have a keeper there.
KatieKupcake4195 9
I find it odd that she was saying getting kicked in the balls hurts more when she has no idea what it feels like to be kicked in the balls because... Yeah. Lol xD Sorry, OP. I imagine that doesn't feel too pleasant
Yaruzu 3
Just imagine being kicked in the ovaries with nothing but a little skin protecting them.
KatieKupcake4195 9
D: I'd rather not imagine that. That sounds ridiculously painful :(
datgamerchick 14
79 - Oh, us women are VERY familiar with that sensation. We get it every month. They're called cramps.
KatieKupcake4195 9
109 - That's what I was thinking too! Lol I just didn't want to say that because.. well, I've personally never experienced being kicked in the balls (obviously) so I didn't think I could really compare the cramps with it. But yeah, cramps feel horrible :(
spencerbalog 0
Dump her.
missamazinggg 12
Try squeezing a pumpkin through a key hole. There's your answer
WearingHats 14
Except keyholes aren't elastic.
missamazinggg 12
I was just trying to give an example. I couldn't think of something small and elastic
BradleysMommie 0
Ouch that sucks!(: but honestly I think it's mutual getting kicked in the balls is probably the worst pain for a guy besides kidney stones :'( but as for us girls giving birth is by far the worst pain ever coming from experience!(:
kireee 0
You sir were dead wrong :p