Today, I got more pleasure from scratching a bug bite than I've gotten from my boyfriend in 2 whole years. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I got more pleasure from itching the bed bug bites from sleeping over at my boyfriend's house than I got from actually sleeping with him. FML
Today, I finally got to see my girlfriend's mouth open with pleasure… while she was scratching a bug bite. FML
Today, I realized how bad my sex life is when I scratched a mosquito bite and almost had an orgasm. FML
Today, I get more pleasure out of scratching my balls than I do out of any sexual activity with my girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for what I thought was a persistent bug bite. Turns out it was a mole I'd never noticed. I had been scratching it then applying anti-itch cream for weeks. FML
Today, I realized I get more pleasure from a tampon than my boyfriend I have been having sex with for the past six months. FML
Today, in spite of 2 different types of bug spray, underwear, and jeans, I discovered not one, but two mosquito bites on my vagina. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML
Today, the rash on my thigh started itching again. I felt good after a vigorous scratch, but the relief did not extend to my roommate, who only saw me at my laptop with my hand moving up and down in my pants. FML
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Top comments
XxXCrissyXxX 12
Have you tried talking that out? A little direction never hurt.
Lost_Ghost 8
Toys are always an option.
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Comments (102)
perdix 31
So, what's really bugging you?
pistachiopanda 19
Maybe you should try scratching in the bedroom? That might be mutually beneficial
darwinism 30
Put some water in a pot & let it get stagnant. Soon after you will have a nice little mosquito farm that will provide you with endless hours of pleasure. Or just tell your boyfriend "**** me like an animal"
bexxiiee 11
Maybe, just maybe, you should communicate with him.
Pikawhore 21
Does he know he's not pleasing you? Please tell me you're not faking it.
rememberkids 14
Why don't u do something called communication instead of always saying he sucks? ,
Cazz91 21
You got bitten by the love bug.
svalaedgren 18
Give him pointers on what you like. I'm sure he would appreciate that just as much as you would.
Pokelad 12
So tell him. He can be your your Praying MANtis and you can be his LADYbug. Sorry, I know that was lame.
Rodville 28
I'm kind of in the same boat. My wife has said "I've had my kids so I don't see the need for sex anymore". Luck you however as your not married yet. You can still just walk away.