Today, I finally got to see my girlfriend's mouth open with pleasure… while she was scratching a bug bite. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I got more pleasure from scratching a bug bite than I've gotten from my boyfriend in 2 whole years. FML
Today, I realized how bad my sex life is when I scratched a mosquito bite and almost had an orgasm. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML
Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, an ant bit my penis. That was the first 'mouth' to ever touch it. FML
Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Today, I was laying out in my backyard trying to get some color when I felt a little tickle on my lips. I rubbed them together to satisfy the itch, when I felt a sort of crunchiness popping between them. I had crushed a spider between my lips and its legs were still moving. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
SirEnigM0nk 22
Like the late Kurt Cobain would say, "A mosquito, my libido."
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (1)
SirEnigM0nk 22
Like the late Kurt Cobain would say, "A mosquito, my libido."