Intimacy: Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently,...

By OhGeez - 08/06/2009 19:41 - Canada

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 018

You deserved it 22 726

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Same thing different taste

By auto boogie man - 19/11/2015 16:44 - United States - New York

Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 009

You deserved it 2 146

By skyhawk13 - 30/10/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 126

You deserved it 53 898

Mesmerized

By Embarrassing - 26/06/2021 13:59 - Canada

Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 197

By musicmaniac13 - 18/03/2011 19:08 - France

Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 695

You deserved it 3 357

By Anonymous - 04/04/2014 17:26 - Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 087

You deserved it 20 344

By lifesucks - 24/02/2009 19:21 - United States

Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 960

You deserved it 50 261

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 03:10 - United States

Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 782

You deserved it 10 406

Dozing off

By Math_Rocker - 02/09/2009 22:17 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 325

You deserved it 35 134

This is the future Big Tech wants

By Anonymous - 28/08/2023 22:00

Today, I was playing a virtual reality game at a gaming convention. I got so into it that I didn't realize I was screaming and flailing around in. A crowd had gathered to watch my dumbass embarrass myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 689

By xsnqw - 19/01/2016 22:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 577

You deserved it 6 951

4bbaf9d3caaa8f84 20

Tuesday 9 June 2009 1:59

wow, that sucks. At least you didn't call out someone's name like your mom's, dog's, sister's etc...

FrootLoops_ 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:00

that must have been awkward afterwards :)

Comments

SunnysideUp_ah1 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 5:57

oh geebus.. :P how'd you find out? XD i hope they didnt catch it on camera or something..

jewelzgalore 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 8:17

probably not real, but ******* HILARIOUS

froggy123000 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 0:13

LMFAO!

Fire_lights 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 4:53

VIOLENTLY humping the floor? ROFLMAO

swimchic 0

Friday 19 June 2009 9:30

LMAOOOOO that seriously is the funniest thing I've heard all day but that must have sucked id be totally embarrassed..fyl ha

monkyepum 0

Friday 19 June 2009 23:50

LOL. I BET THAT GOT A HUGE LAUGH. XD Probably scared some staff too.

thatisjank 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 8:52

LMAO! That's hilarious...in tears dude....id SO love you at school, were proably popular after that.

btheb1124 3

Wednesday 24 June 2009 22:39

hahahah this is HILARIOUS! me and my sister cracked up so hard.

insanityismyspec 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 4:05

ouch! that really sucks, but its funny.

lutzluv124 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 11:28

sounds nice call me if your single we could have a great time and we could enjoy humping together! (780-998-7331)

Keywords

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 6

Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to initiate group sex and figured I just needed to be talked into it. I was so mad, I couldn’t throw everyone out fast enough, including him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 979

You deserved it 174

The Top

Today, a man came up to me and asked for a $50 bill in change. Being a good man, I said sure. I gave him the change and he gave me the $50 bill. After walking into Starbucks to buy a coffee, I handed the cashier my $50 bill. She called the cops. It was counterfeit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 884

You deserved it 23 517

Today, I had to have knee surgery. When I woke up, I found myself with a bandage around my head. The surgeon explained to me that one of the students in the operating room had fainted during the procedure, falling over and head-butting me on her way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 761

You deserved it 246

Today, while coming home from school on my bike, I lost control of it, and went straight into a light pole. Thankfully I was at a very low speed. After that, someone splashed puddle of water at me with their car. After getting to home, I went to take a bath during which the shampoo went into my left eye. It's still hurting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 138

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 593

You deserved it 9 070

Today, it's my birthday. I share it with a guy I've been seeing for over six months. I showed up with a handmade pie and a gift bag. His ex-girlfriend accepted it for him, as he was busy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 309

You deserved it 943

Today, I googled for an hour how to open my CD player on my laptop. Turns out, there is none. They just put a space there to make it look like a CD player. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 107

You deserved it 6 421

Same thing different taste

Mesmerized

Dozing off

This is the future Big Tech wants

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