By fuck you, jack - 04/03/2014 20:44 - United States - Peabody

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 150
You deserved it 3 282

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Sounds like your neighbor needs to get laid.

Your neighbour is such a drama queen :/ hope the cops warned him for the unnecessary false alarm!

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Sounds like your neighbor needs to get laid.

If so I'm his neighbour

yeah, coz half the problems of the world could be solved by sex.

Or thicker walls .. That would work too

Thicker walls would work for both situations here ;)

29: I think that all problems could be solved with sex. Crisis in the middle east? Gaza strippers! Appartheid? Apart thighs! Cold War? Mr.Gorbachev, take down those pants! (Plus points if you get the reference.)

#50 - great with plus points. But get the quote right first, yea? *mrs. Gorbachov (which might be misspelled tho)

57: Yeah, it was a typo. My bad.

There are several possible spellings, Gorbachev is also accepted as an English variant.

I meant that I wrote Mr. Instead of Mrs.

Your neighbour is such a drama queen :/ hope the cops warned him for the unnecessary false alarm!

My elderly neighbor is worse. She'll call the cops if I look at her wrong. Talk about racism.

I wonder how many times the cops were called as Op's neighbor "misheard" Op's keyboard as gunshoots as this FML was typed...

Those must be some thin walls if he heard you poke holes. Maybe call him a hooker?

I don't think telling him he's a hooker would help.

@41, maybe not. It probably would make OP feel better though.

How the hell do those even sound similar?

Jack, you fucking nosey bastard.

lmaoo your neighbor is an extra bitch

What a dumb ass. How does that sound like gunfire?

Clearly his neighbor plays too much COD.

If op's neighbour did play too much cod then real gunshots wouldn't "sound real" to said neighbour

Maybe OP should return the favour, calling the cops on the neighbour claiming he heard machine gun fire (even though it was only popcorn). That ought to settle it. If OP is lucky the cops will find something illegal and haul the miserable bastard away.

I hate neighbors like those, fussing for no reason.

Buy bubble wrap.

then he'll call the cops on WWIII

And a heavy duty rolling pin. Machine gun that shit, yo!

That seems to be really air tight...well it shows he cares I suppose but still that was unnecessary