Miscellaneous: Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself...

By fuck you, jack - 04/03/2014 20:44 - United States - Peabody

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 272

You deserved it 3 307

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Fireworks

By Anonymous - 15/06/2025 03:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I tried to microwave a leftover burrito. I forgot to remove the foil it was wrapped in. The microwave went into overdrive in a dramatic display of sparks, the fire alarm went off, and I had to convince the neighbors at my door not to evacuate their apartments. I still haven’t eaten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 618

Simmer down

By Anonymous - 07/03/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I got yelled at by my mother for making noise after midnight. What was the noise? The microwave as I made something to eat. I work the night shift and had just come home from work, and I'm the only person in this house with a job. Apparently, me not paying her overdue bills cancels that out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 101

The dipshit in 4B

By DookDaSpook - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, while I was in a very important meeting on Skype, my apartment complex was evacuated due to the fire alarm going off. The reason was that my neighbor put a fork in his microwave due to him being extremely drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 908

You deserved it 1 387

Doofus

By Pete - 28/09/2025 03:00

Today, I tried to make popcorn in the microwave but forgot to remove the plastic wrapper. The kitchen filled with smoke, the fire alarm went off and my neighbors came knocking to see if I was alright. When they asked what caused it, I had to admit that it was “Erm… popcorn.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 414

Sneaking about

By Anonymous - 30/06/2025 23:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, after spending an exhausting amount of time trying to stay quiet so I didn’t wake my housemates, even to the point of catching the microwave before it went off, I dropped my bowl of food right in the middle of the hallway between the bedrooms with a loud clang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 258

Fireworks

By Louis - 17/08/2025 12:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I tried to warm soup in a travel mug. I forgot to take the metal spoon out. The microwave lit up like a firework display, and I screamed so loudly that my neighbor knocked on my door to check if I was alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 489

By RandomMe - 26/02/2016 08:00 - Cambodia - Sihanouk

Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 701

You deserved it 11 969

Jumpy

By Chelsea - 21/04/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 704

You deserved it 71 119

By fml - 20/05/2010 21:32 - Canada

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 015

You deserved it 7 616

By almost_a_pro - 23/04/2015 13:43 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I was home alone and tried to make some popcorn so I could watch a movie. Thirty minutes later, my parents came home and found me talking to the firemen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 112

You deserved it 9 097

leeebeeeee18 20

Wednesday 5 March 2014 1:20

Sounds like your neighbor needs to get laid.

Zeishah 26

Wednesday 5 March 2014 1:21

Your neighbour is such a drama queen :/ hope the cops warned him for the unnecessary false alarm!

Comments

Yorih17 22

Wednesday 5 March 2014 4:40

jesus sounds like the op needs to get a life! unlucky op! I guess every neighbourhood has those neighbours, you're just unlucky enough to be living next to them!

tygerarmy 35

Wednesday 5 March 2014 5:24

OP, if it happens again get your neighbor in trouble for filing a false police report.

juggalospyder 3

Wednesday 5 March 2014 5:37

I would blast the stadium scene of the movie the town next time. Let him really hear gun shots

buckdharma 37

Wednesday 5 March 2014 5:40

Admit it op. You killed that Hungry Man, didn't you?

JoLekkaDing 7

Wednesday 5 March 2014 8:13

Lol!!! Has he been watching the Oscar Pistorius case?

nachosbabygurl 9

Wednesday 5 March 2014 8:36

your apartment must have paper thin walls or your neighbor has no life

pix3ld3ath 3

Wednesday 5 March 2014 14:17

Dat name

FayeLemire95 12

Wednesday 5 March 2014 19:38

If he was smart, he would try & take a closer look, then maybe try and call the cops

LumpLegacy 15

Thursday 6 March 2014 7:06

I have one of these neighbors. we had the cops called on us at 4 in the morning because our music was to loud. it was off a cell phone and it was playing may day parade. I feel your pain.