By Anonymous - 08/04/2015 10:52 - United States - Oceanside
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I really get tired of hearing how its always the mans fault and how apparently women can't ever do anything wrong because thats bullshit. Maybe they like sleeping in separate beds or possibly even rooms, my grandparents slept in the same bed for years and then decided to move and sleep in their own separate rooms, I think it's a little strange and probably won't ever do it myself, but hey, if that's how they like I say more power to them.
I usually flip out when I witness male/husband/boyfriend bashing, and I'm a girl. Obviously, there are two sides to every story, and then there's the truth. I was a horrible wife, because my ex was a horrible husband. But I am an amazing girlfriend, because I have an amazing boyfriend. No way on earth I'd bash him for his faults, and he's got many, because if you truly love someone, you accept the imperfections that make them perfect. That's my opinion anyway. Love is a two-way street.
I sleep in a different room from my hubby. There is nothing wrong with our marriage. Our toddlers can't sleep well when alone, so they sleep in our bedroom. Motherly instinct prevents me from sleeping deeply with them in the room and my lighter sleep means I get woken up by my hubby's snoring so I sleep in the kid's room until they are ready to sleep there. It's how we maximize every family member's sleep time.
It strongly depends ... if she isn't giving him the sex he needs (and resents sleeping in the same bed because he might want sex), then it's clearly her fault for not being GGG. There are also blameless factors such as snoring, differing sleep needs (4 hours vs 10 hours can be devastating to both) or shifts at work.
Aw, that sounds really sad. Marriage counseling, possibly? Depends on what happened to make you feel this way, I suppose. I hope everything works out.
Aren't you supposed to share a bed with him? I thought that was one of the reasons to get married.
I could definitely see it being the snoring thing. I don't live with my boyfriend yet but if we do live together one day I'm honestly not sure how I'll be able to cope with the snoring every night. Or maybe OP is just someone who likes a lot of space when they sleep
I'm right there with the snoring thing. My parents have separate rooms at different ends of the house because my Dad snores like a damn chainsaw. I share a wall with him and it's too much. Unfortunately for my sanity however, I'm well aware that they still have a healthy sex life and a great relationship.
I'm sorry, but here is how I imagine getting married for tax reasons: Man and woman go out for nice dinner, movie, etc. after dinner, man gets down on one knee, looks lovingly into woman's eyes, and says, "Babe, I want to save money on taxes for the rest of my life with you! Will you marry me?" Everyone in the restaurant proceeds to stare awkwardly as the woman jumps in excitement at the thought of saving money.
if that's the reason you want to marry, you're either young or stupid. I've shared my bed with many women, even after I got married. That's not the main reason to get married ... it is a perk that most of the nights, I have someone to cuddle. It's not a reason to get a marriage license though ... I had that for years before I married her and years. Heck, I had that for years before I even met her ...
What?!? Maybe you shouldn't be married if you don't even want to sleep in the same bed as him
Not necessarily. I've known couples who are great together and genuinely care about each other but prefer not to sleep together for whatever reason (someone snores, they have different sleep schedules, one's just not a cuddler, etc.). Doesn't mean anything's wrong with the marriage...in fact, depending on the couple, sleeping separately might even strengthen it.
My parents sometimes don't even sleep in the same house, let alone the same bed. And they're one of the happiest couples I know. They have an apartment in the city in addition to their home. They also both go on business trips a lot. Are you suggesting my dad and stepmom get a divorce because they don't spend every single moment of their lives together?
People seem to be missing that op is "disappointed" that she has to sleeps with her husband, which suggests that they don't have a happy marriage. If op's issue was only that the husband snores then I think it would've said so in the FML. It definitely sounds like they're in an unhappy marriage to me. Op, try going for counselling, there's no reason for you guys to have to live so unhappily together.
He's your husband, why are you already NOT sharing a need with him?