Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML
Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, my email got hacked and sent all my contacts something for Viagra. My husband thinks I really sent it to him on purpose and now won't even talk to me. FML
Today, I discovered the same erotic pictures my wife emailed to me while I was deployed were emailed to several other guys by her. FML
Today, my coworker asked me for advice for a clever comeback after she got an unsolicited dick pic. I sent her some zingers to roast the creep into oblivion. Afterward she sent me screenshots. I recognized the mole and birthmark immediately. It was my husband. FML
Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML
Today, I received an email invitation to a dating web site. It was from my father-in-law. FML
Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML
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Top comments
Ilovelife07 0
damnnn thats rough. forward her a breast enlargement offer
DarthFurby 0
Haha ouch. Kind of a bitch way to give you the hint.
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Comments (160)
fnonnie 0
Actually, forward her Kegel exercise instructions...
GlobeNinja 0
guts, thats a real bitch
Melodious 0
#16. I've never had sex, and the mere thought of having it disgusts me to no end. D: Oh, yeah. "EVERYONE LIKES SEX."
a_boat 0
How is it 'take a hint'? Some people on this site are real dumb.
benshady 0
Maybe she's right
misssweetie 0
#8: that's perfect! but seriously, from a girl's perspective, I wouldn't want to sleep with a guy with a synthetically enlarged penis. lame. She was probably joking...hopefully
fml1358 0
i'm a girl and i know that most girls wouldn't want to sleep with a guy who got his penis enlarged so i have a feeling that she was sending it to you as a joke
jukeboxhero420 0
**** your life and **** your wife.
0geckofun_ 0
Just have sex with the computer than.
krisFrAnHeehar 0
#16 obviously you have NEVER taken a health class or have remotley ANY idea how the human body works. The size has nothing to do with it, although people have preferences it's about hitting a certain spot which any size can reach. So either your just trying to be a dick about it or you have an IQ of about 12. And OP FYL INDEED! oh and #72 lol, but he has to wait till she's about to walk in the door and scream "YOUR SO MUCH BETTER AT THIS THEN (inserts wife's name here)!!!!"