Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML
Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, my email got hacked and sent all my contacts something for Viagra. My husband thinks I really sent it to him on purpose and now won't even talk to me. FML
Today, I discovered the same erotic pictures my wife emailed to me while I was deployed were emailed to several other guys by her. FML
Today, my coworker asked me for advice for a clever comeback after she got an unsolicited dick pic. I sent her some zingers to roast the creep into oblivion. Afterward she sent me screenshots. I recognized the mole and birthmark immediately. It was my husband. FML
Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML
Today, I received an email invitation to a dating web site. It was from my father-in-law. FML
Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML
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Top comments
Ilovelife07 0
damnnn thats rough. forward her a breast enlargement offer
DarthFurby 0
Haha ouch. Kind of a bitch way to give you the hint.
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Comments (160)
Dogmaw 0
Damn it. Dude. DAMN. I mean....DUDE! Wow, dude. I mean WOW. Look into it. Keep the lady happy.
WolfgangDS 0
Tell your wife that those things make your penis longer, but make it ridiculously skinny at the same time. She'll be much less happy with it.
wbrycem 0
How could the guy deserve having a small penis? Lol. And 27 ftw.
burtonboard97 0
what the **** #26? where did it say there was a teacher invovled?
monkey314159 0
That's when you give her an e-mail with instructions on "how to give a good *******".
daredevil09 0
what my friends usually say to me which pisses me off "i'd put the boot to her" LOL but seriously thats harsh
Funderful 0
Send her an Email for breast enhancement.
candii_fml 0
thattt suckkss hahahah i agree with #121 :)
ZiggyMorrison 0
this is a Jimmy Carr joke
SumGayGai 0
It's a joke deal with it