Today, I found out my mom put breast milk in my cereal until I was 7 years old. FML
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Same thing different taste
HOW COULD YOU?
Today, I received a 7-page text message during school from my mom yelling at me because I ate her cereal. FML
Ewww, gross
Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML
Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML
Today, I found out my babysitter has been selling the breastmilk I produce for my baby and replacing it with formula, while still taking my money every week. FML
Shudder
Today, in public, one of my mom's friends asked me how on earth did I get so tall. My mom happily scampered to my side and shrieked, "TWO YEARS OF BREAST MILK!" FML
Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast. I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful. Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth. FML
Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML
Mommy milkers
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Top comments
dudeguybruh 6
She wanted to be breast friends with you
MattStro 23
How did you find this out??
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Comments (215)
dudeguybruh 6
She wanted to be breast friends with you
BoxFullOfLazy 25
The first comment on here ever to make me laugh. You the real MVP.
Namenlos_fml 20
I accordance with the standard procedure of reading good puns, I reacted first with momentary anger before laughing and up-voting. Well played!
Candace7 19
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You poor child....that's disgusting.
larrena2377 26
how is that disgusting? babies live on breast milk for the first part of their lives..some even until they are 3 and 4. it's not like they were drinking it straight from the boob
tdawg91 17
We're the only mammals on the planet that have sexualised our mammary glands so much that we consider it "disgusting" when they fulfil their main purpose
wheresmymary 22
It's actually really good for your immune system
Arwen_Evenstar 37
Biologically children can usually breastfeed until 5-7 years old roughly, something to do with how the mouth grows. Isn't it odd that something, human milk, she was born to drink is considered more gross than a cow's breastmilk.
Candace7 19
I never said breast feeding was gross just that she gave it to him until he was seven. Once a child develops teeth they should not be given breast milk anymore.
purplhaze88 20
Just fyi some babies are born with teeth, should they not nurse? Your logic is flawed. Her child her body her right.
kaablam 17
have you never seen a puppy on its mothers teet ? dang puppies have razor teeth
Ted_brosby 4
I understand what you're saying. I have a 7 year old now. It would be really weird for my wife to pump breast milk and pour it in his cereal. But it is the healthiest thing a baby can eat. Here's too much info: I tasted breast milk a few years ago. Won't do that again.
Candace7 19
I'm not saying she can't do what she wants with her child just saying I think it's gross. My opinion that breast milk are for babies not children. Get over it: ).
DarksideDoll 31
@141 Really? I'm just curious because both my husband & I have tasted mine. It tastes like 1% or 2% milk but sweeter. Maybe it's different for each person..
DarksideDoll 31
Sorry for the TMI.
AshBash2211 14
My brother had a tooth at 2 months... 6 by the time he was 6 months!
trtnt25 19
155 I think body fluids in general all have different tastes depending on the person. Some semen and vaginal lubricant can range from being sweet to being bitter depending on what they eat. I ate 20 tangerines in a week once and my current boyfriend said I tasted sweeter and better then usual. And a few years back I had a boyfriend who ate zucchini everyday and his semen tasted just like it, I almost puked. I've heard similar information like this from friends about breast milk varying in tastes
JohnTheDonJuan 11
How was the mother still producing breast milk 7 years after giving birth? Doesn't that stop a couple years after the birth unless she got pregnant again?
letmetalkplease 13
My husband thought it tasted like honeydew melons lol he loved it...
letmetalkplease 13
Not if she keeps pumping. There's even herbs and what not she can take to keep her supply up.
RecklessLove 18
Yeah, as long as she maintains a regular pumping schedule she can still produce milk for years. Also, my bf tried my breast milk and said it's really sweet and that it's good.
skyrim_fanatic 17
@165: GOOD FOR YOU
Tsula1994 13
Breast milk is flavoured by what you eat, so yes it is different for everyone.
Tsula1994 13
If you keep expressing milk or feeding, you can keep producing breast milk for a long time. Some women stop because they don't eat properly, feed often enough, etc. And you can still produce breast milk if you become pregnant while breast feeding, but the doctor will tell you to stop breastfeeding because the milk will contain pregnancy hormones.
LalaDee561 8
You obviously have no idea how beneficial breast milk is for babies and children. The longer they get it, the better off they are.
MattStro 23
How did you find this out??
_Peppermint_ 34
Hey...at least it's healthy...very unusual but healthy..
Ms_ValS 27
Yeah true. What with the growth hormones that are expressed in cow's milk.
kaablam 17
It's only really healthy if the person that makes the milk is healthy. If they are using drugs/medications or alcohol, certain things transfer through the breast milk.
Nahpets 22
I wouldn't want something like this. FYL
mmmxr 11
I don't think any one does....unless it's a weird fetish or something.....
Apersonishere 5
"all fetishes are weird except my fetish" Really I hate when people say a fetish is weird, just because you don't find something attractive doesn't make it weird.
Echoa21 18
"I like when strippers void their bowels all over my body" am I allowed to think that's weird?
Chicagoillinois 18
Apparently not to that guy
ohSNAPyall 26
You shouldn't be fetishizing your mom, Oedipus.
igg125 30
How is that a bad thing? I'm assuming you turned out fine. Obviously you liked it for seven years
turtle713 3
Oh please. Breast milk is good for you. FYML for you not being appreciative of her efforts to provide you a great source of nutrients.
mmmxr 11
That's true plus it take forever to pump breast milk!
soulreaper12296 28
Actually they found that once you're around 2(not 100% sure if that's right) breast milk doesn't have any benefit to you that cow's milk doesn't.
mfmylifesrsly 29
breast milk only benefits you until a certain age. I'm all for breast feeding but obliviously OP was done with his moms milk but OPs mom wasnt ready to wean him. Which is a bit weird.
Bex628 20
Actually, it never loses nutritional value. It changes day to day, even feeding to feeding, to provide the nutrients a child needs. You know that new special toddler formula with extra DHA and ARA (or something like that), breast milk has all of that, and in the amounts that the toddler needs.
tdawg91 17
Breast milk has more nutrients than cows milk so even if you're 60, it's still benificial
RecklessLove 18
Humans aren't even supposed to consume cow milk. We're the only species that drinks another species milk.
gearhead369 20
I'm envisioning this one going with the other fml about shooting milk out her ******. Sorry for giving you all the same mental image now too
nonsensical 26
you nasty
gearhead369 20
Haha! Of course you would say that to me lol
happypenguins 24
You just Made my day Thank you
gearhead369 20
Anytime!
briang959 47
Breast comment ever.
NicoleStephens 4
Thanks that's a WONDERFUL mental image.
Doctor_W_H_O 18
There is nothing wrong with breast milk, if she didn't actually get you to suck directly from her who cares
xluciferx666 21
Ahhh breakfast the breast....*ahem* I mean best meal of the day