Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
High times
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
Dad jokes, part #23556
Today, I finally let my parents meet a boyfriend of mine for the first time ever. My dad mentioned how he was happy to finally meet him, because for the past 4 years he'd thought I was gay. FML
Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend got a job was so that he could buy weed. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my dad. He met him after my boyfriend ran his truck into a tree, and my dad had to pick us up. FML
Today, my friend decided to come clean to his parents about his pot usage. He told them that he did it with me on many occasions. His parents decided it would be the right thing to call my parents. Thanks a lot asshole. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML
Today, my dad's face flushed when I introduced him to my new boyfriend. I live in a small town, and it turns out my dad recognized him. He's the secret child from an affair two decades ago. He's my half-brother. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML
Top comments
one11oh 2
does he get a family discount now?
chilearmy123 4
Maybe he can hook you up with the good stuff
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Comments (168)
Rodders_SOTC 1
Free weed!!!!
loloalltheway 23
Well obviously you knew your boyfriend is a weed addict so you kind of deserved it.
acidkitten 14
just because someone smokes weed it doesn't mean they're an addict.
Mauskau 36
Kind of does..
hahachun 4
I smoke weed once a week, does not make me an addict. Weed is not addictive.
thatonename 7
Not physically addictive at least. It is still possible though.
tober389 1
I almost died smoking four whole marijuanas. But seriously though... Weed isn't addictive and you should really know what you're talking about before you say anything. It makes you look really stupid.
Renee_Margaret 2
The only way to die from smoking weed is to smoke at least 7 times your body weight in a short period of time and you actually don't die from the drug you die from smoke inhalation. I am sure you had a bad high though!
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
"I almost died smoking four whole marijuanas." Sounds legitimate.
insomniac8400 13
yeah I'm pretty sure just about any person would pass out before they could smoke enough to kill themselves
loloalltheway 23
Okey, not addicted then, smoking weed. Better? #29 read the fml again, it clearly says she knew her boyfriend is smoking weed.
Spankmymonkeylol 6
32 , four whole marijuanas ? Yea I bet you're high right now
hopsinlove17 26
You can't die from marijuana. Nice try guys. You can, however, force the neurons in your brain to become dormant
esines 9
How does nobody get that Tober was making a joke with that "four whole marijuanas" thing? He even said but seriously afterward.. Not a very funny joke, but still a joke
octopussperm125 18
Wtf is a weed addict, what is this madness!!!!!!!!!
dwc2134 5
No proof of that. No more anecdotal evidence of that than "people who are constantly stoned tend to say and do stupid stuff", either.
kosherbean 0
U can't be addicted to marijuana A I use a bong it filters out the addicted stuff
kkillaj 5
There is the possibility of a mental addiction not physical though but anything can be mentally addicting go to the gym for a year then stop suddenly and something won't feel right.
rickdick 10
Are you a a jack wagon, lol the only way ur addicted to anything is through a blunt which still is the tobacco ur addicted too
Khariau 8
He has now a good excuse to go to your place
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Hook me up, I'm running out.
FMLshark 12
A chipmunk on marijuana. That's a frightening image.
HiIAmKevin 8
Alvin is that you?!?!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
No, I'm not Alvin. However, I did have a few flings with him.
Snake867 1
Your life does suck, you've got a low life boyfriend that smokes weed, and a low life dad that sells weed. You're surrounded by losers!
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Just because someone smokes weed doesn't make them a lowlife. That's like saying that everyone person on the planet who smokes cigarettes is a scumbag. The action doesn't dictate what kind of person they actually are. Just because her father sells weed doesn't make him a lowlife either, for all you know that's the best he could do to get additional money for the family to be able to pay their bills. Seriously, I know someone who has three different jobs and is still barely scraping by on their bills who would jump at an opportunity to be a dealer simply because it's good money because a large percentage of the population smokes weed.
DocBastard 40
Sorry Chibi, but I respectfully disagree. I agree that smoking marijuana doesn't necessarily make one a lowlife, but knowingly doing something illegal just to make money DOES. If he HAD to sell it to save his child's life, that's one thing (though I can't think of how that could possibly happen). Selling illegal drugs just to make a few bucks is just wrong, and there's no way around that. Before anyone jumps down my throat about the legality of it, it's still illegal where OP is posting. So at least as of right now, it's illegal and wrong.
the_true_batman 10
Doing something illegal doesn't make you a scumbag. You're saying someone who freed slaves was a scumbag? Someone who protested their government's actions is a scumbag? Weed is illegal, but it isn't addictive, and it's less harmful than either tobacco or alcohol, so I don't see how using it makes you a scumbag. I think it makes you a scumbag to judge people that way though. Weed being illegal is unjust, although less unjust than slavery. I don't look down on people who disobey unjust laws. I know some amazing people who smoke weed. They do it because it's more relaxing and safe than alcohol, and it makes them more creative. They are not scumbags, and I find it offensive that you blindly label them as such. The only bad thing about buying / selling weed is that you're not paying taxes, but that is the governments fault. People who buy / sell weed should donate the money they would have paid in taxes to worthy causes. I'm going to remember this if I ever purchase weed. I'll consider it tax dollars being used at my discretion. I think I'll give to children's hospitals, it's a better cause than most of what the government does.
jizzwold 21
Batman I agree with most of what you said other than the thing about doc being a scumbag. He just has a differing opinion and I'd hate for your whole argument to be debased because of a little name calling. Doc, I don't think that doing something you know is illegal necessarily makes you a bad person or a scumbag. The law does not dictate what is morally good and bad because morals are subjective and we can't possibly represent every single persons unique views through one set of laws. All I'm saying is that ops dad is not automatically a bad person just because he sells an illegal drug. If you think that selling drugs is what makes him bad then you have to support that idea with something other than the legality of his actions.
Snake867 1
The dad selling weed is a low life because he is taking the easy way out and making easy money. He is not only risking putting himself in jail, but also putting his family through hell. What happens when the DEA bust him, seize his house and accounts due to the fact that they have all benefited from illegal income? If he wasn't a low life he would find another way to support his family that is legal. The boyfriend is a low life simply because he is a continuous pot smoker. What girl really wants to marry a pot head? Hey honey can you watch the kids for a min, oh wait your high again, neveind.
absolutegrrr 7
I enjoy sniffing the occasional magic marker pen?
jsprackman 11
Weed is dope xD
SW500 13
Actually we have medical here, so In the event the both possess medical cards and proper lisenced for operating a dispensary, they're in the green(excuse the pun). Not likely based on the fml, but it's legal by the state here. Federally it's still illegal though, yeah.
SW500 13
Medically legal I reiterate. And it was meant to doc.
esines 9
So if I win the lottery I'm a low life too right? You know since I'm making so much money so easily..
letmehavemytea 21
One of my friends is studying honors neuroscience at uni and smokes weed a lot. Not exactly sure how someone that smart who will end up making lots of money is a lowlife. I suppose that makes me a lowlife for doing weed every once in a whole being a lowly Arts student and all. Hahah seriously, if you're hating on people who take an occasional hit, chances are that you're just someone who never got a chance to have fun like that thanks to the stick up your ass, and for gods sake don't say it's because you're too smart for it-believe it or not it's actually possible to be smart and party. I graduated high school with honours after completing the I.B. program (it's an international version of your AP) and I partied lots. Weed doesn't harm you at all. Makes you all mellow and comfortable and the only thing that might take a hit is your wallet. So yeah, keep on going through life hating people who can have fun. It's one thing to just not want to smoke it, because that's completely fine, but it's a whole 'mother thing to stereotype and judge people because of it. Oops, I wrote quite a bit.
Dinger1992 3
At least he doesn't hate him.
desireev 18
Well, if you knew that he smoked, then you could have avoided this awkwardness by NOT dating a pothead!
SW500 13
Some potheads make great lovers though...like anyone else.
xxjenn27xx 8
I would be pretty happy, but im a pothead soo others might think differently
keven501 12
Great at least the father won't have a problem with his weed addiction
tober389 1
Weed isn't addictive...
caleb2196 4
you don't get addicted to weed. that's just what people say when they get caught so they can keep smoking without others thinking worse about them
stormchaser24 24
So will your boyfriend get a discount now?