Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I fell asleep on the way to a pool party and woke up covered in sharpie swastikas and dicks. FML
Doofus
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally got home and attempted to relax. My dad went to hand me the remote and dropped it right on my nuts. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML
Cruel Summer
Today, I went to the hospital to get a cast that I have been wearing for the past three months removed from my wrist. Thanks to said cast, I couldn't have any summer fun at all. The doctor took a final X-ray and said, "Well look at that, your wrist wasn't fractured to begin with." FML
Today, I fell off of the deck in my backyard, which wouldn't have been that bad if my drunk, idiot brother hadn't jumped off behind me yelling, "FINISH HIM!" while delivering a bone-crushing body slam. He is fine. I, however, am currently getting a cast for a broken arm. FML
Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML
Top comments
robbilee 14
just paint it or cover it with marker
stacster 0
well grab a sharpie and start turning penises into space ships
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Comments (243)
daddyleo19 0
that sucks lol
stacster 0
well grab a sharpie and start turning penises into space ships
BloodyHeel 8
Nooo, Australia isn't multicultural at all .... ********.
MrBond007_fml 6
oh I'm sorry was that inappropriate. I didn't mean it like that I just meant that he wasn't totally screwed. I mean the outback is just full of hard core white ausies.
GothicAngel17 24
mate, most the people in the outback are aborigine. and the white guys are ******* who think theyr awesome with theyr P plates and theyr nissan patrols. Jus' sayin'...
abstar 0
I believe you have watched crocodile Dundee and assumed that was a true representation if Australia. well done.
codbloodedkill3r 0
Dude I'm Australian and I've never been to the outback I actually live in the city and just hang with ppl, so yer actually go to Australia be4 u make accusations!
gnarkill313 0
easy fix layer the cast with strips of normal printer paper soaked in glue then apply to cast wait till it dries then good as new trust I've broken all my limbs and I have ******* for brothers
katieLOVE095 0
white out?
dropdeaddani 0
Someone must have fallen asleep with their shoes on...kidding, kidding. FYL, however. That was a jerk move on your dad's part.
MrBond007_fml 6
I'm sorry was that inappropriate? I just meant that he isn't totally screwed, I mean common, most of Australia is outback, and the outback is full of hard core white ausies.
Xgabe_thekingX 0
hit in not kicked in js
FYLDeep 26
Your dad ought to know better than to put your personal views out in the open.
IBelongToJeebus 0
Hahahahahaha