Health and Painful: Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally...

By Jeff - 02/08/2019 04:00 - United States

Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally got home and attempted to relax. My dad went to hand me the remote and dropped it right on my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 644

You deserved it 135

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By fucking har har, dad - 05/10/2012 23:38 - Australia

Today, two days after leaving hospital with a broken left leg, I tripped and fell heavily on the floor. My dad quickly asked if I'd broken my other leg. When I reassured him that I hadn't, he disappointedly muttered that it would've been a hilarious story to tell his friends at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 561

You deserved it 2 375

By Anonymous - 16/09/2014 16:18 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 362

You deserved it 4 047

In pain

By Khail Lozano - 02/04/2022 00:00

Today, I was making my bed and had an armload of pillows. One slipped and I tried to catch it between my arm and leg. I missed, sending my fist into my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 741

You deserved it 253

By justhelpful - 02/07/2012 17:44 - Austria - Mils

Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 135

You deserved it 2 031

By whovian221b - 25/08/2015 22:46 - United States

Today, after coming home from the hospital after I fractured my foot, I fell in the bathroom and dislocated my wrist. The ER doctor couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 959

You deserved it 2 141

By Username - 08/10/2010 10:53 - France

Today, I was making my bed, which would normally be a simple task, until I leaned into the wooden foot of my bed, and put my entire body weight on my left nut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 256

You deserved it 10 466

By shanxi - 23/05/2012 18:47 - United States

Today, I was discharged from the hospital after having scrotal surgery. When I got home, the anesthetic had worn off, but I felt okay. Then my dog jumped up at me, paws slamming straight into my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 664

You deserved it 2 506

Wakey wakey

By sacked - 22/02/2010 19:51 - United States

Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 366

You deserved it 24 006

Hurting over here

By wo-ow - 06/06/2014 23:09 - United States - Bronx

Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my leg. My dad helped me to the car so he could drive me to the hospital, but when he saw our neighbor, he went over and had a 15 minute screaming match with him over how his dog keeps shitting on our lawn, all while I sat in the car in agony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 337

You deserved it 4 329

By Anonymous - 06/01/2015 16:40 - Vietnam - Ho Chi Minh City

Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 613

You deserved it 4 699

RichardPencil 30

Friday 2 August 2019 5:16

His testicles, balls, scrotum, ‘nads, gonads, stones, huevos...

RichardPencil 30

Friday 2 August 2019 5:17

Was it an accident or retribution for the ginormous medical bill?

Comments

slowhandjp 16

Friday 2 August 2019 4:18

Hi! I'm Japanes.What does "right on my nuts''mean?

RichardPencil 30

Friday 2 August 2019 5:16

His testicles, balls, scrotum, ‘nads, gonads, stones, huevos...

RichardPencil 30

Friday 2 August 2019 5:17

Was it an accident or retribution for the ginormous medical bill?

Memnoc 26

Friday 2 August 2019 7:15

Pain displacement therapy!

Keywords

Love Awkward Relatable Students Work Racism Health Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Intimacy Sex Food Revenge Animals Cats Boredom Management Kids Parenting Sexism Parents Miscellaneous Weird Job interview Social Media Jealousy

The Top

Today, my roommate asked me for help finding her wallet because it’s been lost for days. I helped a bit, but it never turned up. I left to go to my boyfriend’s house as I'd planned. Guess whose wallet I found laying on the ground next to his night-stand? And why it was there… FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 62

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend for cheating on me. I refused his calls, so he texted, not to apologize, but to say I'd "left some clothes in his suitcase"; i.e., he stole some of my clothes. When he didn't get the response from me that he was hoping for, he texted, "I'm wearing your shorts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 120

The Top

Today, another typical interaction with my ex-wife, which is always fun. Her: "Thank you for the e-transfer. When do you get back today?" Me: "Drop the kids off after 4." Ex-wife: "Sure. You could treat me with decency instead of acting like a controlling dictator." Eight more years of nonsense. I sure can pick 'em. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 895

Today, I had to stay at a friend's house because my dryer caught fire. My friend decided to start cleaning, so he put on his music playlist. By sheer coincidence, the first song that played was "Light My Fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 145

Today, after two months of being teased by my friends for getting wasted and passing out from only one shot, I learned that I wasn't actually too weak to handle the alcohol. My "friends" had secretly laced my drink with sleeping pills. They're now teasing me for believing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 472

You deserved it 481

Today, my boyfriend who has just returned from his 3 month placement abroad cancelled our date. Why? Because there was a match England vs Germany. A friendly match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 692

You deserved it 4 231

Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 840

You deserved it 60 785

Today, I found out that while my sister can somehow manage to keep an eye on and control her three preschool-aged children at the park, making sure nobody steals my dog from right beside her is just too big of a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 495

You deserved it 3 409

Same thing different taste

In pain

Wakey wakey

Hurting over here

Top comments

Comments