Need to know what it is about him that was giving her panic attacks.

This is harsh, but you should probably ask for a divorce. If she isn’t lying, it’s most likely for the best that two not be together. If she is lying, you deserve better.

Sounds like she need to see a psychiatrist, or he’s too clingy and she can’t stand it. Some people hate being under one roof with their significant others for long period of time.

Side piece?

Giving her her way all the time was your first problem. She’s probably bored of you being a doormat.

sounds fishy to me

This isn’t you’re fault and you deserve better because if this goes on she’s going to start thinking that she’s god and then a divorce will send her into a downward spiral in which she will probably become violent and delusional thinking that she no longer has the ability to be wrong. You need to nip this in the bud now.

Were you there for her emotionally? Can you honestly say you both had the same connection when you both first got married? I don't know the whole story between the two of you but you, as you claim, always "giving her her way" means jack shit if she can sense you don't really love her anymore.

Perhaps part of the problem is that you "gave her" her way. Marriage isn't about allowing your spouse to do things - that should be the very least of it. Both partners should be able to make decisions, rather than seeking approval.

So why is she having panic attacks. Why are you giving into everything she says? You sound like you are clingy with little self esteem...