Intimacy: Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied,... - FML

By Anonymous - 10/12/2011 03:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 864

You deserved it 8 980

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, honey.

By Fluffy - 13/12/2017 19:00

Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 641

You deserved it 907

By The fat and the ugly - 27/10/2011 18:56 - Finland

Spicy

Today, I was getting out of the shower, when my boyfriend decided to ask, "Did your boobs get smaller, or did you just gain weight around them?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 127

You deserved it 5 154

Epitaph

By Anonymous - 16/05/2020 14:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend to honestly tell me if I had become overweight. He replied that yes, I had, but that it was OK because I was his "Lumpy Space Princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 058

You deserved it 1 420

By notsoskinny - 18/04/2009 16:13 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 943

You deserved it 18 634

By Srain - 07/01/2010 06:36 - Australia

Today, feeling confident, I asked my boyfriend what he thought of my new body, since I had lost 16 kilos over the past month. He told me that he missed the old me and wanted me to gain weight again. My boyfriend was the one that encouraged me to lose weight in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 473

You deserved it 3 851

Roll with it

By anon - 17/09/2019 22:00

Today, my boyfriend encouragingly told me that he could tell I was losing weight, all because I had one roll fewer than usual on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 498

You deserved it 301

Awful line of inquiry

By teddyissmall - 14/04/2014 06:29 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 045

You deserved it 7 425

Hot bod

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 08:39 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me that I appear to have gained some weight. After realizing that it made me feel depressed, he tried to make me feel better by making love to me. I decided to go with it. While doing so, he paused and said, "I'm sorry baby, but your weight is too much pressure for my back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 639

You deserved it 8 683

By cc - 24/11/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 476

You deserved it 7 908

Mr Romantic

By Mellon - 09/12/2021 01:59

Today, I was doubting my boyfriend's feelings for me, so I asked him if he found me attractive. He replied, "Well, you're thin enough…" That's all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 192

Next

Top comments

irokyoursox 6

Saturday 10 December 2011 8:35

Why do you need to ask someone of you've gained weight you can just step on a scale

Meme1988 18

Saturday 10 December 2011 8:31

Well, its less "work" for you :)

Comments

x123 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 17:54

Atleast he didn't lie to you.

pokemai 6

Saturday 10 December 2011 18:04

71- Dude, the whole post is about sex possisions.. Like doggystyle and so ? Missionary is called that, because it is the most 'pure' way of having sex .. With The man on top and all.. Of course the missionaries have sex, how else would they reproduce? Even I thow all this shit, and I'm freaking Danish..

mikh_fml 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 18:47

Don't put out. Maybe he'll be nicer next time.

Stallion91 6

Saturday 10 December 2011 19:04

Dude I cracked up to your first 2 comments lmaoooo

CryMoreFMLs 14

Saturday 10 December 2011 19:09

Benabus - Quit thumping your bible. I'm Catholic, and you're making ME ashamed.

bubo_fml 10

Saturday 10 December 2011 19:19

Switch places & enjoy your workouts!!

bearjtbear 1

Saturday 10 December 2011 20:32

shouldn't have asked is you didn't want the answer.

ballllller16 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 20:41

I would punch that guy in the nuts !

babyzann 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 22:36

This is a good one!!!

bizarre_ftw 21

Saturday 10 December 2011 22:48

Hmmm a new tactic that allows us to be lazy in bed? GENIUS!!! You, ma'am, deserve a medal!! *three cheers!* hip hip! *takes bite of cake* Hhugrraighgij!!! Hig hipf! Hur-galsnvbbaeygc! *devours cake* Sorry, what were we doing? Hey honey! Wanna have sex?

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The Top

Today, I am lying next to my new husband. We went to Hawaii for our honeymoon and planned on spending the entire time in bed together. We succeeded in that goal, with both of us unable to leave each other's side for entire week. Sex? No. Food poisoning? Yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 519

You deserved it 3 295

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 572

You deserved it 8 693

The Top

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 306

You deserved it 16 769

Today, as I was trying to get out of bed, my foot began sliding across the floor. I instinctively tried to balance myself, only for the new angle to cause my right hip to painfully and loudly dislocate, making me fall face-forward into my dresser. Back stuck in bed after three days of freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 136

You deserved it 386

Today, I was driving with a friend when we saw a wallet in the middle of his neighborhood road. When we picked it up, we saw it was loaded with cash. We drove to the man's house to return the wallet, and when we handed it to him he told us, "I would give you a reward but I don't have any cash." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 243

You deserved it 6 024

Today, I rang up a customer’s items. The total came out to $24.67. She handed me a bag full of coins and looked at me expectantly. I asked if she had any other payment methods; she got irritated and said ,“If I did, I wouldn’t have given you this, stupid!” I had to count them. She was still 6 dollars short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 134

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 089

You deserved it 2 313

Today, I decided to make an almighty breakfast of fried eggs and bacon. I couldn't find anything to flip the eggs with so I used a red spatula that my sister handed me. As I was finishing a delicious fry up, my mom came downstairs and asked me why the cat litter scoop was resting in the frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 057

You deserved it 430