By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 05:52 - United States

Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling romantic, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 856
You deserved it 27 889

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Undoing someones pants while they're asleep isn't romantic. He's a guy you could have just woken him up and told him you were horny.

It was a knee-jerk reaction. It happens to the best of us.


It was a knee-jerk reaction. It happens to the best of us.

flipflipflipidel 0

you have to know by now riding a public bus will get you mugged at some point in the U.S I'm from Seattle and every night on the news there's always some video from a metro bus with something happening, so hide yo kids hide yo wife and hide yo wallet because they jacking everyone around there!!!

lol sorry iPhone cut and paste screw up on that lay post what it shoulda been is looks like a cane or wooden shalaliege or however it's spelled sitting in a gutter or just some leaves and water

My profile pic is an arrowhead and that's my walking stick beside it. The arrowhead type is "waubesa". It was knapped out of flint rock by Native Americans during the Woodland Period (500 B.C. - 500 A.D.). I found this one myself. Researching and studying these types of artifacts is my hobby, hence the username "rockhound". Probably way more information than you wanted, but hey, you asked.

mbusey 20

I see what you did there #1...

AliaChen 5

what did you expect? you're stupid. he was sleeping!

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Guys are supposed to love being sexually assaulted in their sleep? I probably would have kicked her in the face too before I found out who it was.

I know, op was lucky only to get a knee to the eye. when I tried this with my girlfriend, her dad put 4 bullets in me

pugbear 0

Question is did he slept again or did he got op to change the car gear with limited visibilty ??

I've got a friend who's highly trained in unarmed and knife combat. If someone touches him when he's sleeping then he's literally on top of them likely with a knife to their throat before he's even awake. Gotta be careful.

Undoing someones pants while they're asleep isn't romantic. He's a guy you could have just woken him up and told him you were horny.

Exactly also if the genders were reversed the guy would probably get locked up...

Get locked up for undressing your girlfriend? Boy, in what country do you live? OP, it can even be worse! Just read this cool and painfull story. Once upon a time, there was a male friend of mine, sleeping with his girlfriend. The girlfriend tried to be 'romantic' to give him a ******* while he was still fast asleep. The uncontrollable reaction of my friend: slap her. The uncontrollable reaction of his girlfriend: bite in his penis. The end.

You can indeed get locked up for undressing your girlfriend if she doesn't consent. Just because you're dating doesn't give you 24/7 access to a person's body.

idk what set of laws you live by but my laws state if she isn't screaming "no!" then its not rape

SirEBC 7

I think the word "romantic" should be replaced with something else. YDI for expecting a reward for undoing a sleeping person's pants.

FYLDeep 25

How about replacing "romantic" with "his wiggly bits"?

Alrighty!!! "Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling his wiggly bits, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML"

FYLDeep 25

Much better. I should be able to sleep at night now that you changed it. Unless of course someone starts unzipping my pants...

Glad to be of service, though I can't help you if KaySL starts touching you....

FYLDeep 25

You triggered your boyfriends "rape reflux". Your body is designed to wake up when someone starts taking your pants off. You've probably heard the old saying about "not being caught with your pants down". Well it's even worse if your caught bent over with a 10'' dick up your backside in addition to merely having your pants down. Hence you have the "rape reflux", your bodies natural preventative measure to ward off these horrible scenarios. I like to think of it as the "KaySL alarm".

FYLDeep 25

And yes, I just noticed I spelt reflex horribly wrong.

SirEBC 7

And you used the wrong "your," but who's keeping tabs?

FYLDeep 25

That one was kinda hard to notice since I wrote your so many times.

SirEBC 7

I just thought I'd point it out before some entitled asshole came along and acted like you were the stupidest person on the planet for making the mistake.

FYLDeep 25

Thanks a lot, you entitled asshole. I'm not sure if that's what you were going for.

SirEBC 7

Quite the contrary, actually. -_-

FYLDeep 25

I don't know how much it is the you're/your thing anyway. I **** up the spelling for that just as much as other words. It's just there's no red line under the word if you spell a different word in its place. And if you're typing fast, it's easy to miss it.

SirEBC 7

You're preaching to the choir.

"Your" is possessive, as in "your mom." "You're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're awesome." It's a common mistake people make, I wouldn't worry about it. I didn't even catch that mistake until the second guy pointed it out.

who teh **** cares if its speeld rong as long as u can tell wht they meen...

Yes, I'm with trihty fvie on tihs, who caers how you sepll sutff. Idiots.

Pssh, guys, the non-English speakers have a hard time reading comments with much mistakes in. Just saying.

corkscrew8888 0

You know what 64, you're absolutely correct. Nobody cares if you spell things right. Oh wait! I forgot that if you ever want to get a job of higher quality than the McDonald's you work at, you need to have a basic understanding of the English language! Idiot.

Maybe, but who the **** cares on FML? Will we lose at life if our spelling and grammar is wrong here? Idiot.

You will eventually lose at life if you can't understand how to properly construct basic sentences. You really won't get anywhere.

fthku 13

@84 And you need to get a basic sense of humor. And you are aware this is the internet, right? Not everyone are native English speakers? Also, why are you attacking him? the "McDonald's he works at"? He wasn't even talking to you and you seem so angry with this man, whom you know nothing about. Definately not where he works.

Garytt 0

you just wanted to play with his breadstick

fairymacabre 7

8 she wanted to take a ride on his disco stick

I see what you're saying because joysticks remind me of video arcade games, however the way 11 phrased it would make either word sound perverted. P.S. Disco is awesome.

i believe they were quoteing lady gaga who is a new pop music artist thus making this "newer"

A more romantic gesture would be making him a sandwich.

FYLDeep 25

It says she was feeling romantic, but I think she was just horny. So I doubt she would make him a sandwich.

So my comment didn't make you chuckle in anyway?

FYLDeep 25

Well, I certainly agree that when it comes to romantic gestures, "making a sandwich" is close to the top of the list. It's right up there with "shutting the **** up".

threer 30

That's because you're a dick.

I understand you think that is romantic, which it is, but wake him up by kissing him first or with another sweet gesture. THEN when he is to his senses but still sleepy you start to undo him of his pants. Would you want to awaken to your boyfriend undoing your shirt for sex? You will probably complain about his not so romantic moves.

pointcube 0

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Even so, you shouldn't touch someone when he/she is sleeping. Unless, it involves you putting whip cream in their hands and you tickling their face with a feather.

Hide_Yo_Kids 0

#19 ur a **** for defending OP