Today, after walking in on my roommate, I found out that pleasuring yourself with a shoe is a thing. It wouldn't have been so bad if the shoe hadn't been mine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my roommate was responsible for stealing my socks. When I confronted him about it, he told me that he did it because he likes looking at my bare feet and jerking off into my socks. We’re both guys. FML
Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
Today, I found out that my flatmate wears my underwear. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
Today, I was walking in my apartment when I felt something stab my foot. Thinking it was a piece of glass, I looked down. It was one of my roommate's toenail clippings. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML
Today, I caught my roommate trying to use my flashlight as a dildo. FML
Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML
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Top comments
colby6666 43
Get payback with their sock? FYL
Steve95401 49
Pumping yourself with a pump sounds painful.
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Comments (110)
colvindj 22
this would be hilarious if you had Nike shoes. "just do it"
stieglar 17
I mean now he knows what it's like to be in your shoes.
daddysgirl243 21
that's kinda kinky
IWishIWasObama 12
You can get off on your own foot smell! You're sick!
tormcn 26
Maybe s(he) likes you?
shmoooopie 29
Well I know when I like someone I like to make sweet love to their footwear
LunarCat 3
Not that rare, if it's a male with a foot fetish. Lock up your shoes!
amileah13 26
My first thought after reading this was, ew that's unsanitary!
WOTAN1488 24
Just **** It ;)
kingnothing123x 11
Better boil it them
daughternature 7
That's disgusting, and doesn't sound pleasurable at all.