By Anonymous - 24/06/2012 14:17 - Canada - Cochrane

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 047
You deserved it 3 282

Same thing different taste

Top comments

'Come on, it's a bargain! Only one previous owner!'

KiwiKitten 2

Hey he's gotta make money somehow!


KiwiKitten 2

Hey he's gotta make money somehow!

I want to see the car-fax.... Warranty?

In my exerience i've found there are more refined ways of selling sperm. And condoms.

juliaispink 1
juliaispink 1
mylifesucks_fml 1

It is magic! You put it on your finger and it'll turn your sperm into a baby! Ana's if you use it for your other "finger" you may be lucky enough to get an STD too!!!

THE_A_TEEN: Wait...the birthday party was In your basement?? Damn, and here I was thinking it was in Noor's camper...Oh well. I WAS going to give her a special diarrhea monster cake--chocolate flavor, of course-- but if I don't make it, then more for me, I guess. *stifles sobs*

These homeless men are becoming more and more like inventers from the early 1900's with the wierd shit

Effusion 77 you don't know shit bout the 90's ******

juliaispink 1

I think it's funny how I accidentally put that comment twice an one of them has +10 and the other -10!

107- thats because its a double post, the second one usually gets thumbed down (unless people REALLY agree)

How much was he charging? I'm interested...

One man's trash is another man's treasure! Haha

syley 5

I'd be tempted to give him a dollar (not buy the condom) for shear creativity.

At least we was creative while describing the condom.

'Come on, it's a bargain! Only one previous owner!'

Only 4 more to go, and you got a compleat set!

bitch_pleez 10

Well, theoretically it only has 1 previous owner

Inheritance 10

Well used is always cheaper than new..

KiddNYC1O 20
thischick1659 1

Or the people have a skinny dick

MrBrightside21 20

16- "in Cleveland Browns voice" youa fourteen

Not necessarily. They make some tiny condoms. My ex gf had some and they were like xxxs. Those things were tiny. Haha.

egc573 40

That reminds me of the FML about the girl whose boyfriend's thing was so small that he needed a rubber band to secure the condom.

You know what they say about a guy with fat fingers ;)

Wow 64... You just set yourself up for a myriad of easy jokes there.

70- haha no that's not why. She's my ex for being a creepy stalkerish girl who dumped me for another guy then a week later dumped him and wanted me back. Then she stalked me for about a year until she ended up moving away. Haha gotta love crazy girls. 78- I for got about that one. But yeah it must suck to have to use a rubber band to keep something stretchy on. 173-Oh well. It's FML, no big deal. Haha

egc573 40

179-Neither do I. It's probably something really unflattering, like...they don't often have sex because their fat fingers can't open a condom wrapper. (As an example, of course)

AllThatHit 7

they say "d-damn you g-got fat f-fingers". reference anyone?

Take it. You never know when you'll get that offer again!

SenselessPattern 12

He even has a name to help you out with the whole "Common figures of speech confuse me" syndrome that seem to afflict a tragic number of FML-ees. does that mean that this magic, one-fingered glove I bought isn't magic at all?

32, 69 - I know he was being sarcastic, I'm not that dumb. My comment wasn't in response to 4's comment, I was just saying that in general who would buy a used condom? Especially from a homeless guy, it could have an STD or something. You're better off giving the dude some money and telling him to keep it.

144- Log off the computer. Get up. Figure out how to use a sense of humor. Now come back and comment. You're welcome.

153- First of all not everything on FML has to be funny. Second, I'm sorry but I was just trying to clear things up because people were assuming I don't understand sarcasm.

168 - That is because your comment was stupid, obvious, and unnecessary.

180- Well I'll agree with you there. Everyone has a stupid comment every now and then.

Yeah because everyone needs a used condom. I don't even like touching my own after let alone some strangers that could have some problems. Haha.

MindFreakazoid 10

Ok people why are you thumbing this comment down? I thought it was funny :3

That is the most wondrous thing you could ever buy from a homeless guy, but I'm glad you turned him down.

Octain 13

Umm... On her post, in the right hand corner, there is the "female" symbol. Just Sayin'...

fhornbg 7

It's called the female symbol in the upper right corner ( or for the iOS device, at least)

That's true, but one assumes she did.

Give him a break, he had to improvise because he ran out of scrap metal.

Guess you look desperate for children.

kewlkate 9

Yeah... It doesn't work that way.

Where was this? I've been looking for a 'magic-one-finger-glove' for ages!

"Act now, and I'll throw in an STD free of charge!"