By Anonymous - 24/06/2012 14:17 - Canada - Cochrane

Spicy
Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 047
You deserved it 3 282
Intimacy
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

lancesky 7

'Come on, it's a bargain! Only one previous owner!'

314 6
KiwiKitten 2

Hey he's gotta make money somehow!

126 28

Comments

KiwiKitten 2

Hey he's gotta make money somehow!

126 28
Webslinger66 10

I want to see the car-fax.... Warranty?

0 5
munkyjunkie 7

In my exerience i've found there are more refined ways of selling sperm. And condoms.

10 18
juliaispink 1

Now that's a salesman

35 3
juliaispink 1

Now that's a salesman

4 23
mylifesucks_fml 1

It is magic! You put it on your finger and it'll turn your sperm into a baby! Ana's if you use it for your other "finger" you may be lucky enough to get an STD too!!!

5 13
ManInTheMachine 19

THE_A_TEEN: Wait...the birthday party was In your basement?? Damn, and here I was thinking it was in Noor's camper...Oh well. I WAS going to give her a special diarrhea monster cake--chocolate flavor, of course-- but if I don't make it, then more for me, I guess. *stifles sobs*

7 24
_Oblivion_ 12

These homeless men are becoming more and more like inventers from the early 1900's with the wierd shit

12 0
Mistermoomoocow 0

Effusion 77 you don't know shit bout the 90's ******

0 0
juliaispink 1

I think it's funny how I accidentally put that comment twice an one of them has +10 and the other -10!

3 3
42istheanswer 27

107- thats because its a double post, the second one usually gets thumbed down (unless people REALLY agree)

0 0
mmmPoptarts 6

How much was he charging? I'm interested...

8 4
polishperson5253 5

One man's trash is another man's treasure! Haha

8 1
syley 5

I'd be tempted to give him a dollar (not buy the condom) for shear creativity.

2 1
drunkandfml 11

At least we was creative while describing the condom.

3 1
lancesky 7

'Come on, it's a bargain! Only one previous owner!'

314 6
YoungMisfit 9

Only 4 more to go, and you got a compleat set!

23 4
bitch_pleez 10

Well, did you buy it?

18 2
abbybailey204 19

Well, theoretically it only has 1 previous owner

1 23
Inheritance 10

Well used is always cheaper than new..

16 0
KiddNYC1O 20

Just show me the cumfax!

44 2
thischick1659 1

Or the people have a skinny dick

6 58
MrBrightside21 20

16 - Or not.

28 4
ddddddddg 9

16- "in Cleveland Browns voice" youa fourteen

6 26
onlychildFTW 33

Not necessarily. They make some tiny condoms. My ex gf had some and they were like xxxs. Those things were tiny. Haha.

13 10
egc573 40

That reminds me of the FML about the girl whose boyfriend's thing was so small that he needed a rubber band to secure the condom.

40 1
mrszane93 5

You know what they say about a guy with fat fingers ;)

1 10
brackaman 18

Wow 64... You just set yourself up for a myriad of easy jokes there.

4 1
onlychildFTW 33

70- haha no that's not why. She's my ex for being a creepy stalkerish girl who dumped me for another guy then a week later dumped him and wanted me back. Then she stalked me for about a year until she ended up moving away. Haha gotta love crazy girls. 78- I for got about that one. But yeah it must suck to have to use a rubber band to keep something stretchy on. 173-Oh well. It's FML, no big deal. Haha

9 5
egc573 40

179-Neither do I. It's probably something really unflattering, like...they don't often have sex because their fat fingers can't open a condom wrapper. (As an example, of course)

6 0
AllThatHit 7

they say "d-damn you g-got fat f-fingers". reference anyone?

1 4
SarcasticUnicorn 9

Take it. You never know when you'll get that offer again!

83 11
SenselessPattern 12

He even has a name to help you out with the whole "Common figures of speech confuse me" syndrome that seem to afflict a tragic number of FML-ees.

11 2
Superstitious 6

...so does that mean that this magic, one-fingered glove I bought isn't magic at all?

20 0
Queen_Cosmos 7

32, 69 - I know he was being sarcastic, I'm not that dumb. My comment wasn't in response to 4's comment, I was just saying that in general who would buy a used condom? Especially from a homeless guy, it could have an STD or something. You're better off giving the dude some money and telling him to keep it.

3 10
random_jay 6

144- Log off the computer. Get up. Figure out how to use a sense of humor. Now come back and comment. You're welcome.

7 4
Queen_Cosmos 7

153- First of all not everything on FML has to be funny. Second, I'm sorry but I was just trying to clear things up because people were assuming I don't understand sarcasm.

4 11
fmlallthetyme 23

168 - That is because your comment was stupid, obvious, and unnecessary.

8 1
Queen_Cosmos 7

180- Well I'll agree with you there. Everyone has a stupid comment every now and then.

2 2
onlychildFTW 33

Yeah because everyone needs a used condom. I don't even like touching my own after let alone some strangers that could have some problems. Haha.

10 11
MindFreakazoid 10

Ok people why are you thumbing this comment down? I thought it was funny :3

5 6
vucui 21

That is the most wondrous thing you could ever buy from a homeless guy, but I'm glad you turned him down.

35 8
Octain 13

Umm... On her post, in the right hand corner, there is the "female" symbol. Just Sayin'...

13 1
fhornbg 7

It's called the female symbol in the upper right corner ( or for the iOS device, at least)

6 1
vucui 21

That's true, but one assumes she did.

0 2
bananagrams 9

Give him a break, he had to improvise because he ran out of scrap metal.

90 4
Dadothy 8

No, it was a magic one-finger glove.

22 0
KitGrey 4

Guess you look desperate for children.

6 51
kewlkate 9

Yeah... It doesn't work that way.

15 1
Doortje 29

Where was this? I've been looking for a 'magic-one-finger-glove' for ages!

60 3
fuzzzy12 3

IT'S PETER PEDIGREW

1 4
PlayWithElmo 7

"Act now, and I'll throw in an STD free of charge!"

75 2