Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I started hooking up with a guy I've liked for a while. We got pretty into it and he went into my underwear, looking confused. When I asked him what was wrong, his response was: "I can't find it." FML
Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his dick and shocked him. FML
Today, I was fooling around with someone I had met at a club, in my room. It got really heated, and I was really getting into this guy, until he lifts up my leg and asks, "Can I lick your leg?" FML
Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML
Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the family was. At this point I did not realise that I had a used condom stuck to my foot. The family did. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was OK, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
Today, a girl I like was taking her phone out of her pocket and two condoms fell out. Last week I'd tried hooking up with her and she'd said that she only has sex with a man who is her boyfriend. So I said, “Oh, new boyfriend, huh?” She said, “Nah it’s for hookups, gotta be prepared!” I guess she forgot she lied to me. FML
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
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Top comments
epoh_fml 0
that would have definitely irritated your ******.
xlossofmex 0
interesting birth control there.
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Comments (156)
xlossofmex 0
interesting birth control there.
White667 0
Also dangerous, right? That seems like an accident waiting to happen.
YeahFMLxX 0
maybe he was joking at the size of his jock? my girlfriend wouldve just laughed and told me to hit wallgreens.
Rawwrness 3
haha u fail if that sock had a hole in it lolz!! and that is gross
hellokittywhore 0
I call fake her screen names ilovesocks. if she indeed loved socks she would have gone for it. it's a lil convient that that's her screen name. liar. pants on fire.
ilikepie789 0
would it have been better if it was from his right foot?
wintamint101 7
how would it even fit?
Macromartyr 3
Wouldn't that dry things up pretty fast? yeah I'm pretty sure it would...
Sammyhaha 0
**** *****=slore lolz
coolstorybro6969 6
Always have a backup plan
gotpromise 0
haha.. atleast he's creative
Bertha5 0
eeww. was he being funny?
azurablade 0
I call fake, unless he was just joking...
epoh_fml 0
that would have definitely irritated your ******.
Monikabug 9
Especially if he has a foot fungus. Can you imagine having Athlete's Foot in your ******? :l
bambie612 0
ewwwwwwwww #120
coolstorybro6969 6
Athletes ******...yum
CrazyLaughs4Me 17
ugh what the fück does someone say about that?!
JaydnGage 0
feral much.
uhohuscrewedup 0
here's hoping you didn't give him a bj after it. fyl
rider12 0
haha that's hilarious next time stuck in a slow elevator just use a sock
Cruth 2
I hope u didn't had sex with him then…
SenGaeriel 3
You have got to be kidding me?? This is either fake or the OP's guy is an idiot.
jesbar95 10
ew thats kinda gross!