Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML
Today, I met new people at my dorm, only to find they already knew me because they listen to my boyfriend and me have sex all the time. FML
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML
Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML
Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML
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Top comments
xoxcinderellaxox 0
i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.
cocky 0
You should've responded in Chinese by saying, "Too bad I wouldn't feel your tiny Asian dicks!" Buhahahaha.
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Comments (120)
DoomBitchBaby 0
maybe the OP's a guy?
Castfire 0
It says the OP is a woman.
Sixpakastan 0
So the dry spells over?
i_love_germany 0
this is not really an FML. it would have been, if they attempted to rape you or something, but just this is not an FML.
kawaiikitty 0
me love you long time. xDDD
xocourtxo 0
lol OP you shoul just be like. no thanks or whatever :P or just start talkig to them back
munchly 17
I hope at the end of the night you said something in Chinese and winked ;P
arichan_fml 0
that's epic XD
Leetswaglordmaybe2 9
guys talking about banging a chick... how unusual. FYL for being naive
asoldierswifey 0
You should be flattered that you are "bang" worthy! LMAO
danyfuckinheatle 0
that's not bad, it just means your hot. :)