Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML
Today, I met new people at my dorm, only to find they already knew me because they listen to my boyfriend and me have sex all the time. FML
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML
Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML
Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
xoxcinderellaxox 0
i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.
cocky 0
You should've responded in Chinese by saying, "Too bad I wouldn't feel your tiny Asian dicks!" Buhahahaha.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (120)
ifinishlast 0
well Cantonese or mandarin?
daytona81 0
take the compliment and make there dreams come true. lol. and most of my friends are asian. they admit all types of asian people do this like....everyday
gpstyne 0
awesome, but you should have dropped the hammer
HLLAND 0
= =Jion them。。Chinese boys always like that...
Kacie25 0
you should have said something and messed with their minds! lol!!!
lady307 0
you ahouldve stood up and asked "which one of u chinks is first" is chinese! lmao!
epicfail13337 4
WHOA be careful around them! But you must be pretty hot.
jmoose311 3
YDI. Obviously you're known for being a ***** and they were just elaborating on that among themselves. Next time stop eavesdropping on private conversations.
OnerousMemories 0
wow number 46 you totally d-bagged on her. she wasn't eavesdropping she obviously felt uncomfortable in that situation
ArielTheMermaid 17
clearly it wasn't private if it was at the table. stupid.
milkradio 0
Haha, that's when you just make a comment in Chinese and they'll think "oh shit she understands what we've been saying this whole time :/"
im_a_dinosaur 0
hahahahaha thats funny.